Thoughts on two episodes of Moonlighting

 

Courtesy YouTube/ABC

*David Addison (Bruce Willis) and Maddie Hayes (Cybill Shepherd), alone together en route to the Palm Springs vicinity, remain at arms length from each other following her miscarriage in the previous episode*
"There's that tumbleweed again. I hope we're just not driving around in circles."
"All tumbleweeds look the same."
"Yeah. That's what they say about blue-eyed blondes."

If ever there was a show that shouldn't have been produced in its time, it's Moonlighting. I've said that before and I'll say it again. Think of how much drama could have been avoided if Glenn Gordon Caron, the writers and directors, plus Bruce and Cybill, weren't expected to follow the standard of one episode roughly every week from September-May. Ultimately, they stopped or rarely followed that standard, one of many reasons the show alienated its fan base and the powers that be at ABC. And at the time, it still meant something to be a show airing on network television. Nielsen ratings also held a lot more weight than they do now.

*Agnes DiPesto (Allyce Beasley) argues with live-in boyfriend Bert Viola (Curtis Armstrong)

"Remember the last time one of them flew the coop because they couldn't cope?"

"Sure. I practically carried this place."
"You practically buried this place. The Four Horsemen were pitching their tent right here in this office. I can't face that again. *breaks fourth wall to imply audience* They can't face that again. ... So, unless you want to get your butt drop-kicked out of primetime and onto cable, we better do something, pronto!"

The start of Moonlighting's fifth season has a "Please, come back! We've fixed things and we're real sorry!" feel to it. I refuse to revisit "A Womb With a View," the episode with Maddie's miscarriage. When I watched it as part of Moonlighting's run in Thoughts On, I couldn't shake the feeling that co-writer Caron was letting out frustration and aggression towards Shepherd, whose pregnancy and maternity leave impacted the fourth season's production. I felt "View" played like an extended fuck you to Cybill and her then-infant twins. At the same time, I still think Dave and Maddie's catharsis in "Between a Yuk and a Hard Place" is a excellent moment. They're stuck in an elevator, courtesy of Bert's rival, MacGillicudy (Jack Blessing), and Agnes. It seems like hours pass before a Muzak version of "You Must Have Been a Beautiful Baby" triggers Dave and Maddie. He destroys the speaker, she sobs and trembles, they hold each other and it's followed by a gorgeous overhead shot of Maddie resting in Dave's lap as he's up against the elevator car's wall.

Bookending Maddie and Dave's crucial ride is the case of the week. Joan Spring (Cristina Raines), recently married, wants to know more about her husband's romantic past and if his love for her is genuine. Dennis (Rod McCary) hung onto both the wedding rang he gave Christina and a lock of her hair until Joan started gently asking questions. "I'd rather live alone than live a lie." Dave and Maddie visit Harold Swinburn (Nicholas Cascone), Christina's brother. She died 10 years ago, having apparently driven her car off a cliff. As it turns out, Joan looks a lot like Christina. "All this time, I've just been a substitute. A replacement for the woman he really loves." 

Okay, this one's kinda complicated. Here goes:

-- Dennis murdered Christina for her money. He was tried and acquitted, but subsequently felt guilty and tried to have the case retried so he could go to jail. The authorities refused, on the grounds of protecting a person against double jeopardy.

-- Joan was blackmailing Dennis about his past. She was actually killed by Harold, avenging Christina's death. The giveaways were that Harold recognized who Dennis was despite his changed last name and that he had a copy of the Los Angeles Times from the day before (the day of Joan's death) that could only be obtained in the city, not in the Palm Springs area.

-- Dennis is still trying to face the consequences of what he's done. His solution is to get involved with and kill a third woman.

-- Since this is all pretty dour, there's a finale with too much music, Harold in a hot air balloon and David with no pants on (in a callback to Moonlighting's glory days, he's wearing white boxers with red hearts).

*Dave and Maddie continue traveling*

"And you think it's normal that Mr. Spring keeps this secret from his wife?"

"It's not a secret. It's the past. His past. And the past is not community property."

"She has to get past his past. She can't just deny it ever happened."

*Dave chuckles*

"What's so funny?"

"She can't just what it ever happened?"

"Deny it ever happened."

"Oh."

"Oh what?"

"Oh, it's just that I can't help being struck by a certain irony, that's all."

"Irony? About what?"

"Denying."

"You think I'm denying something?"

"No, it's probably just a fluke that you worked harder in the last two weeks than you've worked in the last three years."

"You've been working the night shift, doing your job/But long weeks without you could make a girl sob/Don't worry 'bout me, though, my upper lip's stiff/But a sweet night with you, dear, 'd be some precious gift/So when the stakeout is over, I'll still be waiting/to pick up again with some serious dating/In the meantime, remember, you hunk of a man/that Agnes DiPesto is your biggest fan." 

"Here's Living With You, Kid," the only Moonlighting episode with no appearances from either David or Maddie, first aired on Tuesday, March 15, 1988. A few notes about that night: it was the week after Super Tuesday and included the first regular airings of In the Heat of the Night (against Moonlighting) and The Wonder Years (its pilot was rerun, airing as Moonlighting's lead-in). Over on CBS, 9 p.m. included My Sister Sam, which was being burned off, and the debuting Coming of Age. Sam scored a 7.3, while Age had an 11, which makes me think that the people who tuned in to Moonlighting jumped ship a half-hour in. It's not that "Living" is especially awful. Beasley and Armstrong are great together. But they're great in a filler episode.

Bert's latest assignment has him guarding grapefruit all night. He's maintained his sanity by thinking about his relationship with Agnes. Bert realizes that he wants Agnes to move in, a idea that she needs some time to consider. "Yes, I'm not saying no. No, I'm not saying yes." Sleep-deprived and nursing hurt feelings, Bert imagines himself and Agnes in a Valentino-style silent movie and later, Casablanca. MacGillicudy is Victor Lazlo, greeted by Bert's Café Américain patrons with "La Marseillaise." Sam (Johnny Brown) steals the "Of all the gin joints ..." line from Bert and plays his and Agnes' song, "Chopsticks." There's also a Renault (Ben Piazza), plus some horribly cruel lines by Agnes. "Noble goodbyes are only good if you're the kind of man who's hard to leave." Back in the real world, Agnes has come around to living with Bert. The problem is, he didn't expect her to, so he acted like a big man in front of the guys, saying he rebuffed her pathetic begging for them to live together. It's all soon resolved. Complete with "Chopsticks" and a "The End" title card.

*Dave gives examples of denials, ending with "Size doesn't matter."*

"Well, if anyone would know about that, you would, since you've elevated denial to an art form."

"I deny that I'm the one who's denying."

"Well, deny away, but I'm certainly not the one who's been doing the denying."

"A denial if I ever heard one."

"That was not a denial. That was a statement of fact."

"Oh, see? Now you're even denying that the denial was a denial."

"Yes, I'm denying that I've been denying, which is quite a different thing."

"Okay. You're not denying. And I'm not denying, so we shouldn't have any trouble talking about what we're not denying."

*The two prepare to talk it out, but Maddie has one request*

"You go first."

Thoughts:
-- *Silent Agnes has given Silent Bert a lot of excuses for why she doesn't want to have sex with him, culminating with this title card ...* "Couldn't we just play Scrabble?"

-- Awards Watch: Moonlighting's glory days at the primetime Emmys were over by 1988. The fourth season scored only one major nod, for Imogene Coca's guest performance as Agnes' mother. Moonlighting received no major Emmy nominations and no Golden Globe nominations in 1989. The year before, the show went zero for four, with itself, Bruce, Cybill and Allyce all receiving nominations.

-- Behind the Camera: "Living" was written by Jeff Reno and Ron Osborn from a story by Roger Director, Charles H. Eglee & Kerry Ehrin. It was directed by Artie Mandelberg. "Yuk" was directed by Dennis Dugan, who previously played Maddie's husband, Walter (the marriage was annulled within five episodes). It was written by Ehrin.

-- Hey, It's 1988!: MacGillicudy wants to know the answer "To the big question, the kind that comes along once a year. Will Poindexter implicate the president? Will Leonard take Hagler? Will Agnes consent to move in with you?" ("Living"). Later, David says he and Maddie can sit around and wait until a Democrat's in the White House or they can inform Dennis about Joan's death ("Yuk").

-- Hasn't Aged Well: David responds to Maddie's request of "Out with it" with "Here? Right now, while I'm driving?" ("Yuk"). A lot of Moonlighting's dialogue and action depended on the principles of "I can't believe David just said or did that!" and "David smiled when he said or did it, so it's all in good fun, right?"

-- "She's dead. That doesn't mean Dennis is not in love with her anymore." "Well, it makes it hard for them to meet at the motel."

-- Next: The Cosby Show. On deck: A Different World.