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| Kidding (via Giphy) |
EARLY PRIMETIME
60 Minutes (CBS, 7 p.m.): Tonight there are stories about Sen. Bernie Sanders, the evidence against the four men charged with the downing of Malaysia Airlines Flight 17, and 18-year-old jazz pianist Matthew Whitaker.
The Jeffersons 📺 (Decades, 6:30 p.m.): The series premiere that is still a television masterpiece on many levels. RIP Ja'Net.✔️
Vision of Love 🎥 (UPtv, 7 p.m.): When Katherine's fortune-telling manicurist predicts that she will meet her soul mate with the name Michael, Katherine starts to date a series of Michaels.
War of the Worlds 📺 (Heroes & Icons, 7 p.m.): After a period without any further evidence of the aliens' existence, the powers-that-be try to shut down the Blackwood Project. Meanwhile, the aliens try desperately to find a way to combat the threat brought on by the radiation that is killing them.
FOR THE RECORD: America's Funniest Home Videos (ABC, 7 p.m.); From Scratch (FYI, 6 p.m.); Murdered by Morning (Oxygen, 7 p.m.); Nick Cannon Presents: Wild 'n Out (VH1); Snapped (Oxygen, 6 p.m.)
🕗 EASTERN / 🕖 CENTRAL
Batwoman (The CW, 8 p.m.): New villain Nocturna sinks her teeth into Gotham. Sophie reluctantly requests that Batwoman keep her distance, knowing their interactions could compromise her career.
Columbo 📺 (MeTV, 8 p.m.): Columbo arrives at a kidnapping case. Everything seems to be related to a trust fund managed by Ray Milland with a great love for orchids.
Disney Fam Jam (Disney Channel, 8:25 p.m.): SERIES PREMIERE. Families learn to dance and then compete against other families in this new competition series.✔️
Doctor Who (BBC America, 8 p.m.): In the far future, the Doctor and her friends face a brutal battle across the farthest reaches of space to protect the last of the human race against the deadly Cybermen. Will Jack make an appearance??
Duncanville (Fox, 8:30 p.m.): Duncan's friends replace him with Kimberly in their online video game tournament, so he joins the opposition to betray them and humiliate Kimberly. Annie tries to force Jack to throw out all his old memorabilia that is cluttering the garage.
God Friended Me (CBS, 8 p.m.): Miles is confused when the God account sends him his own name as a friend suggestion. Is God high? Ali begins fertility treatments in an effort to freeze her eggs before beginning chemotherapy.
Just Roll with It (Disney Channel, 8:50 p.m.): Blair and Owen become enamored with the family's new high-tech talking toilet. Rachel and Byron try to prove to their kids that they're still cool enough to hang out with.
Our Cartoon President (Showtime, 8:30 p.m.): Cartoon Michael Bloomberg enlists Cartoon Hillary Clinton to launch a run for president. Cartoon Kellyanne Conway and Cartoon Larry Kudlow enlist Cartoon Elon Musk to create an Oval Office simulator to distract Cartoon Trump. Someone actually writes this stuff!
Outlander (Starz, 8 p.m.): As Jamie continues to hunt Murtagh with the aid of the zealous Lieutenant Hamilton Knox, he's forced to consider whether or not he's on the right side of history.
Raven's Home (Disney Channel, 8 p.m.): Nia gets a crush on Timothee, a French exchange student, and pretends to be a sophisticated Brit to win him over. If this wasn't such a jam-packed night of TV, that synopsis would get it Top Pick in a snap.
The Simpsons (Fox, 8 p.m.): Homer and Marge compete to be the topic of Lisa's "Most Interesting Person I Know" essay. Meanwhile, Professor Frink develops a cryptocurrency, overtaking Mr. Burn's title of richest man in Springfield.
When Calls the Heart (Hallmark Channel, 8 p.m.): PREMIERE. Season seven kicks off as Lucas gives Elizabeth writing advice that causes her to search for new inspiration. Meanwhile, Rosemary and Lee plan a vacation, and Faith returns home with a dilemma that may force her to part ways with Carson.
FOR THE RECORD: 90 Day Fiancé (TLC, premiere); Air Disasters (Smithsonian Channel); American Idol (ABC); The Aquarium (Animal Planet); Autopsy: The Last Hours of... (Reelz); The Circus (Showtime); Highway Through Hell (Weather Channel); Killer Affair (Oxygen); Mira Quién Baila All Stars (Univision); Naked & Afraid (Discovery Channel); The Real Housewives of Atlanta (Bravo)
🕘 EASTERN / 🕗 CENTRAL
Bob's Burgers (Fox, 9 p.m.): Louise skeptically joins Jessica and fifth-grader Megan in their search for Wharfy, a mythical sea monster. Bob takes an online master class by a world-renowned chef.
Collector's Call (MeTV, 9:30 p.m.): World champion figure skater Scott Hamilton shows off his collection of vintage pinball machines and guitars autographed by some rock and roll's most famous.
Family Guy (Fox, 9:30 p.m.): Peter secretly gets a credit card and overspends the family money, so Lois grounds him. To plan the perfect escape, he builds a tunnel to The Drunken Clam.
Homeland (Showtime, 9 p.m.): Carrie arranges a meeting. Haqqani finds trouble at home.
Martha's Vineyard Mysteries: Riddled with Deceit (Hallmark Movies & Mysteries, 9 p.m.): Jeff and Zee track down their friend's missing emerald brooch, a thief, and also... a murderer.
NCIS: Los Angeles (CBS, 9 p.m.): Anna Kolcheck returns to warn Callen that he is in danger and he must now work with an archenemy to stop an underground trafficking ring. Callen's archenemy is Harvey Dent, right?
The Outsider (HBO, 9 p.m.): Sensing something ominous afoot, Claude reconnects with his brother in Tennessee, while Holly, Ralph, Yunis, and Andy follow him in hopes of isolating the evil force and thwarting its next kill.
Sanditon (PBS, 9 p.m.): SERIES FINALE. On the night of the Midsummer Ball, romantic interests are finally resolved, but events conspire to leave Charlotte and the Parker family facing down impossible choices.
Supergirl (The CW, 9 p.m.): Mxyzptlk returns with a proposition for Kara. Also, Kara must decide if she wants to change history to become friends with Lena again. She probably does. I miss Winn.
The Walking Dead (AMC, 9 p.m.): "The group must figure out how to get out of a precarious situation." Whoooooa, this situation is a first of its kind!
War of the Worlds (Epix, 9 p.m.): "After the devastating alien attack, disparate pockets of survivors emerge into a shattered world." This was the same description used for episode one.
What's Eating America with Andrew Zimmern (MSNBC, 9 p.m.): Zimmern goes to Milwaukee where the native perch are disappearing from the warm waters of Lake Michigan.
When Hope Calls (Hallmark Channel, 9 p.m.): This is the pilot episode to the When Calls the Heart spinoff that debuted on Hallmark Movies Now last fall. Same thing, now with commercials!
Wrong Man (Starz, 9 p.m.): When Andy Katrinak finds his wife and infant son gone, he summons the police and tells them he believes they have been abducted, and he suspects his ex-girlfriend Patty Rorrer is involved.
Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (NBC, 9 p.m.): Zoey must decide whether or not to get involved in her boss' troubled marriage after she hears Joan sing a heart song. She also creates a new program for the family to communicate with her dad.✔️
FOR THE RECORD: The Alaska Triangle (Travel Channel); Behind Closed Doors (Reelz); Building Alaska (DIY); Coyote Peterson: Brave the Wild (Animal Planet); Evil Lives Here (Investigation Discovery); Extreme Makeover: Home Edition (HGTV); Heavy Rescue 401 (Weather Channel); La Vox (Telemundo); Race for the White House (CNN); Rise of the Supercarrier (Smithsonian Channel, premiere); Secrets of the Zoo (Nat Geo Wild); Shahs of Sunset (Bravo); Shipwreck Secrets (Science); Worst Cooks in America (Food Network)
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| Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (via Giphy) |
🕙 EASTERN / 🕘 CENTRAL
Avenue 5 (HBO, 10 p.m.): Ryan and Billie try to find the source of an incessant beeping. Rav appeals to the President for rescue funds.
Better Call Saul (AMC, 10 p.m.): PREMIERE. Now doing business as Saul Goodman, Jimmy unveils an unorthodox strategy for client development that tests Kim's tolerance of his new legal persona. Lalo searches for the mysterious Michael, only to discover a problem within his own operation.✔️
Curb Your Enthusiasm (HBO, 10:30 p.m.): When Susie plans a surprise party for Jeff, Larry suspects she has ulterior motives, and enlists the help of his new friend Wally to ensure things don’t go awry.
Dare Me (USA, 10 p.m.): In the wake of a tragedy (uhhh, murder?), Addy and Colette struggle with a shared secret that threatens them both.
Forensic Files II (HLN, 10 p.m.): (Series) PREMIERE. Just like Forensic Files, but with a "II" at the end of the title.
Good Girls (NBC, 10 p.m.): Beth makes a choice that surprises those around her just as an old foe from the past returns. Annie finds a helpful outlet on her road to self-improvement. I think she should get back to her natural hair color.
The Johnny Cash Show 📺 (getTV, 10 p.m.): Hey, hey. First up, George Lindsey, Joni Mitchell, and J South guest star. Later, Joni Mitchell, The Monkees, and Roy Clark guest star.
⭐ Kidding (Showtime, 10 p.m.): So, the children's show lives thanks to sister Deirdre, but her ex wants a lot of the show's beloved puppets which he might get thanks to their divorce. Jeff tries to teach children about change in the first episode of the 31st season of Mr. Pickles' Puppet Time. Later, after an international incident, Jeff, Deirdre, Will, and Seb attend a funeral at sea. Also, Jeff might sign his divorce papers... walking away from Judy Greer. Not easy. And minor note, last week had Mae Whitman guest starring at a marijuana dispensary. She was great.
NCIS: New Orleans (CBS, 10 p.m.): The team must track down a mysterious female assassin responsible for murders in Athens, Rome and London. It's a crossover with Killing Eve!!!! Wade's son begs her to allow him to go on a police ride-along for an article he's writing on a youth outreach program.
The Rookie (ABC, 10 p.m.): In "Day of Death," Nolan and the entire team are in a desperate search to rescue Chen after her abduction. Lopez discovers Wesley unconscious from a dangerous cocktail of alcohol and pills.
Slow Burn (Epix, 10 p.m.): In the wake of the Watergate break-in, Texas Congressman Wright Patman follows a money trail that seems to lead to the White House. An extraordinary game of political cat and mouse follows.
Vienna Blood (PBS, 10 p.m.): SERIES FINALE. Suspicion at the military school centers on an elite group of cadets. Solving the case will impact Oskar and Max's professional lives.
FOR THE RECORD: 100 Day Dream Home (HGTV); Beat Bobby Flay (Food Network); Curse of the Bermuda Triangle (Science); Food Paradise (Cooking Channel, premiere); The Lake Erie Murders (Investigation Discovery); Naked & Afraid: Alone (Discovery Channel); Sister Wives (TLC); Unsung (TV One); The Windsors: Inside the Royal Dynasty (CNN)
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| Better Call Saul (via Disqus) |
🕚 EASTERN / 🕙 CENTRAL
The Twilight Zone 📺 (MeTV, 11:30 p.m.): William Shatner is convinced that a monster only he sees is damaging the plane he's flying in.
FOR THE RECORD: Talking Dead (AMC, 11:20 p.m.)
💤💤😴💤💤
Ballmastrz 9009 (Adult Swim, midnight): PREMIERE. When Ace gets depressed because he has no family to share the joy of his new fame in the game with, Gaz and Babyball make him one. Later, when Gaz catches an embarrassing STD, the Leptons must find a cure before a public appearance.✔️
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| Ballmastrz 9009 (via Giphy) |
LATE-NIGHT TALK & SATIRE
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO, 11:10 p.m.)
Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen (Bravo, 10 p.m.): Tyra Banks and Eva Marcille
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Note: All times are Eastern.
Key Sources: The Futon Critic (outline); Zap2it (descriptions); TV Passport (throwbacks)
⭐: Top pick(s)
📺: Throwback
🎥: Movie
✔️: Midlevel video/gif
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