What's On Tonight (Friday): Attenborough Stops Appropriating Everyone Else's Wildlife...

    

Wild Isles

You know how I realized Earth Day is this weekend?  When I saw that three wildlife series - not specials mind you, because that would be some weak sauce - we're talking about three full-fledged SERIES premiering today.  That's some serious nature shit.  We here at What's On Tonight are big fans of serious nature shit and try to treat every day as if it is Earth Day.  We've seen far too many movies where people who piss off the Earth live to regret it.  

All that remains is to pick which series will be today's Top Pick and therefore represent all of What's On Tonight (Friday) at whatever wonderous festivities we have planned for Earth Day.  Do we have any festivities planned?  We do not, but I have been assured that the brightness of our website will be reduced by exactly 0.3208 percent for almost a full minute some time Sunday morning.  We hear your pain big planet, and we are your allies.

Top Pick

⭐🔔 Wild Isles✔️ (Amazon, 12:01 AM) LIMITED SERIES. 'The five-part natural history series centers on the British Isles, which is one of the most diverse and beautiful landscapes on Earth, and the series is full of behaviors never before seen on screen. The breathtaking aerial photography reveals the beauty of the British countryside, and motion controlled time-lapse photography brings to life the story of the passing seasons. The latest low-light cameras uncover the secret nocturnal lives of many of our favorite animals, and macro photography reveals the miniature worlds of rock pools, ponds, and grasslands. The series was captured over three years in 4K resolution.'

Elsewhere...

*The other two wildlife documentary series are Big Beasts on Apple and Secrets of the Elephants on NGC.  I went with Wild Isles partly because of Attenborough (he's 91 years old!) and partly because I don't have Apple (at the moment) or cable.  You want Top Pick, Apple?  Make with the free subscription.

*This is your warning that the new Apple film Ghosted has absolutely nothing to do with the short-lived Adam Scott/Craig Robinson-starring Fox comedy of the same name.  That probably means nothing to you since I'm one of five people who not only watched but kind of enjoyed the latter.  What the fuck Apple?  Do you ever want Top Pick again?

Both Mandalorian and Picard had their season finales this week.  The Mandalorian finale was probably the best episode of the season, which is faint praise.  I didn't hate this season, but it was definitely uneven and weirdly constructed.  I still can't understand why the two Mandalorian-heavy episodes of Book of Boba Fett were better than anything this season.  

Last week I mentioned the theory that the season was originally not supposed to have Grogu in it, but this week I heard that most of the Mandalore story was lifted straight out of the scrapped Gina Carano series.  I don't know if either of those things are true, but it felt like the ship got steadied in the last couple episodes.  The last scene definitely seems to be setting up a back-to-basics, mission-of-the-week structure like in the first two seasons.  I'd be happy with that.

As for Picard, it also had what I thought was a very uneven season, though it appears I might be in the minority on that one.  The final episode did a nice job of tying up the season and sent the show out on a high note.  It's still my least favorite of the Paramount+ Star Trek series, but I'm glad the last season wasn't an embarrassment and the TNG cast (Stewart and Frakes in particular) acquitted themselves well.  The last scene of the finale teases what could possibly be the start of a new series, and I would very much be down with that.  Just please get the people who make Strange New Worlds to write the thing.

PREMIERES

Judy Blume Forever

🎥 Judy Blume Forever✔️(Amazon, 12:01 AM) 'Documents the life and legacy of trailblazing author Judy Blume.  Known for her radical honesty, Judy Blume's books revolutionized the way millions of readers understood themselves, their adolescence, and their sexuality.  Her fearless mission to openly discuss taboo subjects paved the way to real debate and conversation around book banning, censorship, and teen sexual discovery.'

🔔 Dead Ringers✔️(Amazon, 12:01 AM) LIMITED SERIES. 'Rachel Weisz plays the double-lead roles of Elliot and Beverly Mantle, twins who share everything: drugs, lovers, and an unapologetic desire to do whatever it takes - including pushing the boundaries of medical ethics - in an effort to challenge antiquated practices and bring women's health care to the forefront.'

🔔 Big Beasts✔️(Apple, 12:01 AM) SERIES PREMIERE. 'Features some of the world's most massive species filmed across 17 countries, including the gray whale, the elephant seal, the giant otter, the gorilla, the hippopotamus, the brown bear, the ostrich, the orangutan, the tiger and the polar bear.'

🔔 Drops of God (Apple, 12:01 AM) SERIES PREMIERE. 'Frenchman Alexandre Léger, creator of the famous Léger Wine Guide and emblematic figure in oenology, has just passed away at his home in Tokyo at the age of 60. He leaves behind a daughter, Camille, who lives in Paris and hasn't seen her father since her parents separated when she was nine years old. When Camille flies to Tokyo and Léger's will is read, she discovers that her father has left her an extraordinary wine collection - the greatest collection in the world according to the experts. But, to claim the inheritance, Camille must compete with a brilliant young oenologist.'

🎥 Ghosted✔️ (Apple, 12:01 AM) 'Salt-of-the-earth Cole falls head over heels for enigmatic Sadie - but then makes the shocking discovery that she's a secret agent.  Before they can decide on a second date, Cole and Sadie are swept away on an international adventure to save the world.'

Ghosted

🎥 Life Upside Down (AMC+, 12:01 AM) 'Three couples who know one another are stuck at home during the beginning of lockdown. Jonathan, Clarissa and Paul will see their lives turned upside-down, forced to look at each other and ultimately at themselves.  Starring Bob Odenkirk.'

🎥 Suga: Road to D-Day (Disney+, 3:01 AM) 'Follows SUGA of BTS as he travels around the world from Seoul to Tokyo, Las Vegas and beyond in search of musical inspiration for his upcoming album D-DAY.'

🎥 Chokehold (Netflix, 3:01 AM) 'Evading a scandal, a couple from Istanbul starts over in a town on the Aegean coast — but quickly discover the locals are determined to get rid of them.'

🎥 One More Time (Netflix, 3:01 AM) 'On her 40th birthday, Amelia makes a fateful wish to be 18 again back in 2002 but soon regrets it when she's stuck reliving the day over and over again.'

💎 Rough Diamonds (Netflix, 3:01 AM) SEASON ONE. 'When a prodigal son sends his family's empire into crushing debt, his estranged brother returns to Antwerp's diamond district to pick up the pieces.'

🎥 A Tourist's Guide to Love (Netflix, 3:01 AM) 'Work brings an American travel executive to Vietnam, where a free-spirited tour guide helps open her eyes to a beautifully adventurous way of life. Starring Rachel Leigh Cook.'

🔔 Slip✔️(Roku, 3:01 AM) SEASON ONE. 'Mae is restless in a life and marriage that works. There is love between her and her husband, but little romance. When Mae "slips" and has a one-night stand with Eric, a handsome man she meets at a bar, she wakes up the next morning in a panic, only to realize she's entered a parallel universe in which she and Eric are married.'

🎥 Murder at the Murder Mystery Party✔️(Tubi, 3:01 AM) 'A young, aspiring actress fresh from Texas thinks a murder mystery party will be the perfect way to break into the LA scene — until she realizes that the murder is real, and she's being framed for it.'

🎥 Secrets on Greek Row (Lifetime, 8:00 PM) 'A college student's carefree life explodes when her boyfriend dies in a bizarre electrocution accident, leaving many to suspect she was the culprit. As she tries to clear her name, she soon uncovers a horrifying truth that puts her life in danger.'

🐘 Secrets of the Elephants✔️(NGC, 9:00 PM) SERIES PREMIERE. 'Travel the globe to meet different families of elephants, each with their own set of remarkable cultural behaviors which they've adapted to suit the environment in which they live. This series deploys the latest science and brand-new camera technology to reveal the elephant's secret world, revealing not just how truly extraordinary they are in their own right but also how similar they are to humans.'

🔔 Dear Mama (FX, 10:00 PM) SERIES PREMIERE. 'A docuseries that explores the lives and legacies of mother and son, Afeni and Tupac Shakur.'

Secrets of the Elephants

RETURNING SHOWS

💖 Love Me (Hulu, 12:01 AM) SEASON TWO.

🏠 Diary of an Old Home (HBO Max, 3:01 AM) SEASON TWO PREMIERE.

💖 Indian Matchmaking (Netflix, 3:01 AM) SEASON THREE.

🏝 Welcome to Eden (Netflix, 3:01 AM) SEASON TWO.

🎥 The Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs (Shudder, 9:00 PM) SEASON FIVE PREMIERE.

STREAMING

🔔 The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (Amazon, 12:01 AM) 

⚡ The Power (Amazon, 12:01 AM) 

🔔 Extrapolations (Apple, 12:01 AM) SEASON FINALE. 

🔔 The Last Thing He Told Me (Apple, 12:01 AM) "Keep Austin Weird" 

⚖ Judy Justice (Freevee, 12:01 AM) 

⚖ Jury Duty (Freevee, 12:01 AM) SEASON FINALE. 

🔔 #bringbackalice (HBO Max, 3:01 AM) 

🔔 Who's Talking to Chris Wallace (HBO Max, 3:01 AM) 

👮‍♂️ Cops (Fox Nation, 6:00 PM) 

Dead Ringers

SPORTSBALL TODAY/TONIGHT

🏌️‍♂️ PGA Tour Golf: Zurich Classic of New Orleans, Second Round (Golf, 3:00 PM)

🥍 Boys High School Lacrosse: Calvert Hall (MD) at McDonogh (MD) (ESPNU, 5:30 PM)

🏌️‍♀️ LPGA Golf: The Chevron Championship, Second Round (Golf, 6:00 PM)

⚾ Friday Night Baseball: Toronto Blue Jays at New York Yankees (Apple, 7:00 PM)

⚾ Friday Night Baseball: Houston Astros at Atlanta Braves (Apple, 7:00 PM)

🏀 NBA Basketball: Boston Celtics at Atlanta Hawks (ESPN, 7:00 PM)

🏒 NHL Hockey: Carolina Hurricanes at New York Islanders (TBS, 7:00 PM)

⚾ College Baseball: Baylor at Texas Tech (ESPNU, 7:30 PM)

🏒 NHL Hockey: Boston Bruins at Florida Panthers (TNT, 7:30 PM)

🥊 One Championship Special: One Fight Night 9: Nong-O vs. Haggerty (Amazon, 8:00 PM)

🏀 NBA Basketball: Cleveland Cavaliers at New York Knicks (ABC, 8:30 PM)

🥍 Men's College Lacrosse: Providence at Denver (CBSSN, 9:00 PM)

🏀 NBA Basketball: Denver Nuggets at Minnesota Timberwolves (ESPN, 9:30 PM)

🏒 NHL Hockey: Dallas Stars at Minnesota Wild (TBS, 9:30 PM)

🥊 Bellator MMA: 294: Carmouche vs. Bennett 2 (Showtime, 10:00 PM)

🏒 NHL Hockey: Edmonton Oilers at Los Angeles Kings (TNT, 10:00 PM)

🥎 College Softball: Arizona at Oregon (ESPNU, 10:30 PM)

🏌️‍♂️ DP World Tour Golf: ISPS Handa Championship, Third Round (Golf, 11:00 PM)

Big Beasts

EARLY PRIMETIME

🧽 The Patrick Star Show (Nickelodeon, 5:00 PM) 'Patrick messes with the space-time continuum; while Cecil and Bunny celebrate their anniversary in outer space, Patrick and Squidina throw a house party.' 

💲 Split Second (GSN, 7:30 PM) "Crystals and Sage" 

🕗 8:00 EASTERN / 🕖 7:00 CENTRAL

👮‍♂️ S.W.A.T. (CBS, 8:00 PM) 'The team races to uncover the identities of kidnappers holding a prison guard's family hostage; Tan is faced with a difficult personal decision.'

🔔 Grand Crew (NBC, 8:30 PM) 'Fay helps Nicky and Anthony cope with a big life change; Noah and Wyatt compete for the chance to go to a fancy dinner with Sherm, and there's wine.'

👻 Secrets of Sulphur Springs (Disney Channel, 8:00 PM) 'Returning to the past, Griffin and Harper watch a murder unfold; the twins and Topher go to someone for help.'

🔔 WWE's Friday Night Smackdown (Fox, 8:00 PM) 
🔔 Lopez vs. Lopez (NBC, 8:00 PM) 
🔔 The Very Very Best of the 80s (AXS TV, 8:00 PM) 
🎥 Secrets on Greek Row (Lifetime, 8:00 PM) 
🚗 Engine Masters (Motortrend, 8:00 PM) 
💖 Ready to Love (OWN, 8:00 PM) 
👮‍♂️ On Patrol: First Shift (Reelz, 8:00 PM) 
👻 Power Book 2: Ghost (Starz, 8:02 PM) 
🔔 Saturdays (Disney Channel, 8:30 PM) 

🕗 9:00 EASTERN / 🕖 8:00 CENTRAL

🔥 Fire Country (CBS, 9:00 PM) 'The crew responds to an out-of-control blaze at a wellness retreat; the third rock crew tries to protect one of its own from a dangerous overdose.'

🎭 Great Performances (PBS, 9:00 PM) 'Japanese American composer Andy Akiho creates music using found instruments; developing a music video.'

🍴 Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives (Food, 9:00 PM) 'Guy Fieri's tasting food from coast to coast and across the pond. He samples Irish-inspired egg rolls in Atlantic Beach, FL, mile-high meatloaf from the 18th hole in Vincentown, NJ, and an all-American breakfast with an English twist in Ventura, CA.'

😂 Whose Line is it Anyway? (CW, 9:00 PM)
💀 Dateline NBC (NBC, 9:00 PM) 
💰 Gold Rush: Parker's Trail (Discovery Channel, 9:00 PM) 
🔔 Saturdays (Disney Channel, 9:00 PM) 
👽 The Unexplained (History, 9:00 PM) 
🚗 Roadkill Garage (Motortrend, 9:00 PM) 
🐘 Secrets of the Elephants (NGC, 9:00 PM) 
💖 Put a Ring on It (OWN, 9:00 PM) 
💀 The Real Murders of Atlanta (Oxygen, 9:00 PM) 
👮‍♂️ On Patrol: Live (Reelz, 9:00 PM) 
🎥 The Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs (Shudder, 9:00 PM) 
💖 Love After Lockup (WE, 9:00 PM) 
🔔 Blindspotting (Starz, 9:02 PM) 
😂 The Great American Joke Off (CW, 9:30 PM) 

Slip

🕗 10:00 EASTERN / 🕖 9:00 CENTRAL

👮‍♂️ Blue Bloods (CBS, 10:00 PM) 'Danny and Baez investigate a case of grand larceny tied to feuding crime families; Frank clashes with Mayor Chase when an influx of immigrants arrive in the city; Erin questions whether her district attorney campaign is compromising her day job.'

🎭 Next at the Kennedy Center (PBS, 10:00 PM) SEASON FINALE. 'Jazz bassist Christian McBride and jazz pianist Jason Moran perform, tell stories about their teachers and introduce their proteges.'

🔔 Dear Mama (FX, 10:00 PM) 'Tupac Shakur navigates school, poverty and family, while dreaming of using poetry and music to spread the message of his mother, noted Black Panther activist Afeni Shakur; haunted by her past, Afeni fears how it will affect Tupac's promising future.'

🔔 Real Time with Bill Maher (HBO, 10:00 PM) 
💰 Gold Rush: White Water (Discovery Channel, 10:09 PM) 

LATE NIGHT

🔔 The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon (NBC, 11:34 PM) 'Actress Sienna Miller; actor Nikolaj Coster-Waldau; comic Ryan Hamilton.'

🔔 Late Night with Seth Myers (NBC, 12:37 PM) 'Actor Adam Scott; singer Jeff Tweedy; Wilco performs; Fred Armisen sits in with the 8G Band.'

😂 Black Lady Sketch Show (HBO, 11:00 PM) 
🔔 Real Time with Bill Maher: Overtime (CNN, 11:30 PM) 
🔔 Jimmy Kimmel Live! (ABC, 11:35 PM) 
🔔 The Late Show with Stephen Colbert (CBS, 11:50 PM)
🔔 Nightline (ABC, 12:37 AM) 
🔔 Late Night with Seth Myers (NBC, 12:37 PM) 
🔔 The Late Late Show with James Corden (CBS, 12:52 AM) 

Broadcast/Cable/Satellite - RETRO BINGE

The Andy Griffith Show (Sundance, 6:00 AM - 1:00 PM); Law & Order (Pop, 6:00 AM - 8:00 PM); Brooklyn 99 (Comedy Central, 7:00 AM - 2:00 PM); M*A*S*H* (TVLand, 7:00 AM - 11:00 AM); Roseanne (CMT, 9:00 AM - 12:00 PM); Living Single (TVOne, 9:00 AM - 12:00 PM); Hawaii Five-0 (Ion, 10:00 AM - 2:00 AM); Gunsmoke (TVLand, 12:00 PM - 4:00 PM); Law & Order (Sundance, 1:00 PM - 1:00 AM); Seinfeld (Comedy Central, 2:00 - 5:00 PM); Family Ties (Antenna, 5:00 PM - 6:00 PM); The Office (Comedy Central, 5:00 PM - 11:00 PM); One Day at a Time (Antenna, 6:00 PM - 7:00 PM); Three's Company (Antenna, 7:00 PM - 8:00 PM); The Jeffersons (Antenna, 8:00 PM -9:00 PM); Everybody Loves Raymond (TV Land, 8:00 PM - 11:05 PM); Barney Miller (Antennae, 9:00 PM - 10:00 PM); King of Queens (TV Land, 11:05 PM - 2:00 AM); Designing Women (Antenna, 11:30 PM); Becker (Antenna, 12:00 AM - 1:00 AM); Wings (Antennae, 1:00 AM - 2:00 AM); Alice (Antenna, 2:00 AM - 3:00 AM); Benson (Antenna, 3:00 AM - 4:00 AM); Mom (TV Land, 3:10 AM - 4:50 AM)

📺 Johnny Carson (Antenna, 10:00 PM) 'Comedian Paul Lynde; actor McLean Stevenson; actor Bob Uecker; actress Carol Wayne.'

Murder at the Murder Mystery Party

Key Sources: The Futon Critic; Zap2it; Netflix; Wikipedia; Horrornews.net; Sysfy.com; hollywoodreporter.com

⭐: Top Pick
💲: Game show
🎥: Movie
📺: Throwback
✔️: Video/gif/photo included