What's On Tonight (Friday): He's a Caveman; He's a Cave, Caveman; oh, He's a Caveman...

 

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I was a little concerned Franko would include Genndy Tartakovsky's Primal in the Thursday WOT, perhaps even give it Top Pick status.  He would have been within his rights as I consider 12-2 AM on Saturdays to be open game for the Friday WOT Top Pick.  Well, Thursday's WOT Top Pick's loss is Friday's WOT Top Pick's gain.  

Almost three years after the first season premiered, Spear and Fang are back for more dialogue-free, darkly violent yet oddly beautiful adventures in a fantastical prehistoric world where cavemen, dinosaurs, ice age megafauna and creatures of myth all co-exist and are frequently trying to kill and/or eat each other.  That might sound like a Creationist's wet dream but it's actually pretty great.

Elsewhere...

*Amazon has a film about a boy falling for a trans girl directed by Billy Porter.  It's at 79% on Rotten Tomatoes as of Thurs morning.  This could easily have been a "tragic message movie," but it sounds like it's more of a typical and optimistic teen romance that doesn't ignore the difficulties the two leads would endure.  These days I definitely prefer more of the latter than the former.

*Apple has a new series about a boy with a prosthetic leg who begins public school after having been home schooled his whole life.  The series was inspired by Paralympian Josh Sundquist's memoir.  Part of me has a hard time believing kids would give someone with a prosthetic leg a hard time, but people are fucking awful, and kids are just little people (which is why we need movies that remind them not to be awful).

*The Russo brothers, who recently made it known that they don't think movies necessarily need to be shown in theaters, an idea that I'm sure will endear them to theater owners everywhere, have a new film on Netflix.  It stars Ryan Gosling and Chris Evans, but it also has Billy Bob Thorton, who I assume had a house payment due or something.

I binged the most recent season of Solar Opposites and it's still very weird and very funny.  I've finally gotten to the point where I don't hear Rick Sanchez every time Korvo speaks.  It helps that the character doesn't have a reason to say "Morty" every other line.

⭐🔔 Genndy Tartakovsky's Primal (Adult Swim, 12:00 AM) SEASON TWO PREMIERE. 'Emmy Award-winning Primal returns for a new season that leads Spear and Fang on bigger, more brutal adventures than ever before'

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PREMIERES

🎥 Anything's Possible (Amazon, 12:01 AM) 'Follows Kelsa, a confident high school girl who is trans, as she navigates through senior year.  When her classmate Khal gets a crush on her, he musters up the courage to ask her out, despite the drama he knows it could cause.  What transpires is a romance that showcases the joy, tenderness, and pain of young love.

🔔 Best Foot Forward (Apple, 12:01 AM) 'Follows 12-year-old Josh Dubin as he goes from homeschool to public school, eager to experience everything middle school has to offer! But along the way, Josh also faces a brand-new set of challenges, including how to get an entire school of kids to see past his prosthetic leg, and get to know him for who he is. With the support of his parents and the help of his best friends, Kyle and Gabriella, Josh learns, laughs and grows, eager to come back every day for more.'

🎥 Happening (AMC+, 3:01 AM) 'In 1963 France, Anne, a young and talented student, gets pregnant, seeing her opportunities to finish her studies and excel slipping away from her. As her final exams approach and her social life begins to fade, Anne's pregnancy progresses, forcing her to confront the shame and pain of an abortion, even if she must risk prison to do so.'

🎥 The Gray Man (Netflix, 3:01 AM) 'When a shadowy CIA agent uncovers damning agency secrets, he’s hunted across the globe by a sociopathic rogue operative who’s put a bounty on his head.  Starring Ryan Gosling and Chris Evans.'

👮‍♂️ On Patrol: Live (Reelz, 9:00 PM) SERIES PREMIERE. 'Reunites the on-camera team of host Dan Abrams and retired Tulsa Police Department Sgt. Sean "Sticks" Larkin, alongside Deputy Sheriff Curtis Wilson. Together, they will provide minute-by-minute live analysis as the series documents for viewers in real time the everyday work of police officers on patrol from diverse departments across America.'

RETURNING SHOWS

🔔 Trying (Apple, 12:01 AM) SEASON THREE PREMIERE.

🔔 Blown Away (Netflix, 3:01 AM) SEASON THREE.

🐶 Better Human, Better Dog (NGC, 8:00 PM) SEASON TWO PREMIERE.

🔔 Blood & Treasure (CBS, 9:00 PM) SEASON TWO PREMIERE.

via Tenor

STREAMING

🔔 Black Bird (Apple, 12:01 AM) "Whatshername" 

🚀 For All Mankind (Apple, 12:01 AM) "Bring It Down" 

💰 Loot (Apple, 12:01 AM) "French Connection" 

🔔 Physical (Apple, 12:01 AM) "Don't You Run and Hide" 

🔨 Hollywood Houselift with Jeff Lewis (Freevee, 12:01 AM) 

🔔 Beach Cottage Chronicles (Discovery+, 3:01 AM) 

🔔 Conjuring Kesha (Discovery+, 3:01 AM) "Into Bigfoot's Lair" 

💖 Love in Paradise: The Caribbean (Discovery+, 3:01 AM) 

💖 Love Island (UK) (Hulu, 3:01 AM) 

🔔 RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars (Paramount+, 3:01 AM) 

🔔 RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars: Untucked (Paramount+, 3:01 AM) 

🔔 Big Tiny Food Face-Off (YouTube, 12:00 PM) 

💖 Love Island (Peacock, 9:00 PM) 

SPORTS TONIGHT TODAY LIVE

🏌️‍♂️ PGA Tour Golf: 3M Open, Second Round (Golf, 2:00 PM)

🌽 Cornhole: 2022 ACL Pro Shootout #6 (CBSSN, 6:00 PM)

🏌️‍♂️ Golf: U.S. Girls' Junior, Semifinals (Golf, 6:00 PM)

⚾ Friday Night Baseball: Chicago Cubs at Philadelphia Phillies (Apple, 7:00 PM)

🏀 The Basketball Tournament: India Rising vs. Boeheim's Army (ESPN, 7:00 PM)

⚾ Friday Night Baseball: Cleveland Indians at Chicago White Sox (Apple, 8:00 PM)

🏀 WNBA Basketball: Dallas Wings at Chicago Sky (CBSSN, 8:00 PM)

🏃‍♂️ Track and Field: World Athletics Championships (USA, 8:30 PM)

🔔 X Games 2022 (ESPN, 9:00 PM)

🏈 CFL Football: Winnipeg Blue Bombers at Edmonton Elks (ESPN2, 9:00 PM)

🏀 The Basketball Tournament: We Are D3 vs. AfterShocks (ESPNU, 9:00 PM)

🥊 Bellator MMA: 283: Lima vs. Jackson (Showtime, 10:00 PM)

via ResetEra

EARLY PRIMETIME

🔔 Total Dramarama (Cartoon, 6:15 PM) SEASON FINALE. 'As the season draws to a close, Bridgette becomes desperate to star in an episode.'

🧽 SpongeBob Squarepants (Nickelodeon, 7:00 PM) 'lankton joins the League of E.V.I.L.; SpongeBob and Patrick take Squidward on a plane to a tropical resort.'

🔔 Bunk'd: Learning the Ropes (Disney, 7:30 PM) 

🔔 Eureka! (Disney Jr, 7:30 PM) 
💲 America Says (GSN, 7:30 PM) 
🧽 Kamp Koral: SpongeBob's Under Years (Nickelodeon, 7:30 PM) 

🕗 8:00 EASTERN / 🕖 7:00 CENTRAL

👮‍♂️ North Woods Law: Uncuffed (Animal Planet, 8:00 PM) 'In Maine, the elite Game Warden Services patrols more than 18-million acres of rugged terrain. For the wardens, hunting season is peak time for catching poachers, tracking dangerous wildlife and performing intense search-and-rescue missions.'

🧽 The Patrick Star Show (Nickelodeon, 8:00 PM) 'Patrick and Squidina report the news around Bikini Bottom; "The Patrick Show!" presents the epic conclusion to the first half of its first season.'

🔔 Ultra Violet & Black Scorpion (Disney, 8:30 PM) 'Violet's world turns upside down when she meets Cascada, a glamorous super luchadora who blurs the lines between right and wrong.'

👀 Big Brother (CBS, 8:00 PM) 
🤼‍♂️ WWE's Friday Night SmackDown (Fox, 8:00 PM) 
💰 Gold Rush: Parker's Trail (Discovery, 8:00 PM) 
🔔 The Villains of Valley View (Disney, 8:00 PM) 
🎥 Keeping Up with the Joneses Movie Series (LMN, 8:00 PM) 
🔨 Making Modern with Brooke and Brice (Magnolia, 8:00 PM) 
💀 Living with a Serial Killer (Oxygen, 8:00 PM) 

via Tenor

🕗 9:00 EASTERN / 🕖 8:00 CENTRAL

🔔 Blood & Treasure (CBS, 9:00 PM) 'As Danny and Lexi finish tracking down the last of Farouk's black-market antiquities, they begin to make plans for their future, but their plans are derailed when the Vatican is attacked by terrorists; a person from Danny's past returns.'

🍴 Diners, Drive-ins & Dives (Food, 9:00 PM) 'Guy Fieri finds new takes on classic favorites, a palm desert, California place serves avocado fries and a burger with an Italian accent; a Jersey twist on soul food in Atlantic City, N.J., and a barbecue joint has its own take on bruschetta.'

🍴 The Great American Recipe (PBS, 9:00 PM) 'The six remaining home cooks present their favorite special occasion and holiday recipes, which include modern takes on classic gourmet fare and old-time family recipes.'

💰 Gold Rush: Dave Turin's Lost Mine (Discovery, 9:00 PM) 
🏠 My Lottery Dream Home (HGTV, 9:00 PM) 
👽 Ancient Aliens (History, 9:00 PM) 
🐶 Cesar Milan: Better Human Better Dog (NGC, 9:00 PM) 
👮‍♂️ On Patrol: Live (Reelz, 9:00 PM) 
👻 Ghost Adventures (Travel, 9:00 PM) 
🤮 Mama June: From Not to Hot (WE, 9:00 PM) SEASON FINALE. 

🕗 10:00 EASTERN / 🕖 9:00 CENTRAL

🔔 American Anthems (PBS, 10:00 PM) 'Cam and songwriter Dre Williams write an original folk anthem for Black Book Project founder Meredith McKinney, who provides underserved children with books that feature diverse characters.'

🔔 Antiques Roadshow Recut (PBS, 10:30 PM) 'A Coca-Cola neon clock; a Klingenthal violin and bow circa 1920; 1934 "Babes in Toyland" stop motion animation soldiers.' 

🎵 CMT Campfire Sessions (CMT, 10:00 PM) 'Singer-songwriter Brandy Clark is joined by friends around the campfire to swap stories and perform stripped down versions of her biggest hits, including "Mama's Broken Heart" and "Who You Thought I Was."' 

🐶 Cesar Milan: Better Human Better Dog (NGC, 10:00 PM) 
🤼‍♂️ All Elite Wrestling: Rampage (TNT, 10:00 PM) 
💰 Outback Opal Hunters (Discovery, 10:02 PM) 

via Tenor

LATE NIGHT

🔔 The Rehearsal (HBO, 11:00 PM) "Scion"

🔔 Late Night with Seth Myers (NBC, 12:37 PM) 'Actress Wanda Sykes; singer-songwriter Kesha; writer Patrick Radden Keefe; Jonathan Ulman sits in with the 8G Band.'

💰 Outback Opal Hunters (Discovery, 11:02 PM) 
🔔 The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon (NBC, 11:34 PM) 
🔔 Jimmy Kimmel Live! (ABC, 11:35 PM) 
🔔 The Late Show with Stephen Colbert (CBS, 11:35 PM) 
🔔 Late Night with Seth Myers (NBC, 12:37 PM) 
🔔 The Late Late Show with James Corden (CBS, 12:37 AM) 
🔔 Nightline (ABC, 12:37 AM) 

📺Broadcast/Cable/Satellite - RETRO Binge📺

📺 The Andy Griffith Show (Sundance, 6:00 AM - 1:00 PM); Warehouse 13 (6:00 AM - 6:00 AM); The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (VH1, 8:00 AM - 11:00 AM); Roseanne (CMT, 9:00 AM - 1:00 PM); ER (Pop, 9:00 AM - 3:00 PM); Living Single (TVOne, 9:00 AM - 11:00 AM); M*A*S*H* (TVLand, 9:00 AM - 11:00 AM); Hawaii Five-0 (Ion, 10:00 AM - 2:00 AM); Gunsmoke (TVLand, 12:00 PM - 4:00 PM); Law & Order (Sundance, 1:00 PM - 2:00 AM); House (Pop, 3:00 PM - 8:00 PM); Seinfeld (Comedy Central, 3:00 PM - 6:00 PM); Welcome Back, Kotter (Antenna, 5:00 PM); One Day at a Time (Antenna, 6:00 PM - 7:00 PM); The Office (Comedy Central, 6:00 PM - 11:00 PM); Three's Company (Antenna, 7:00 PM - 8:00 PM); The Jeffersons (Antenna, 8:00 PM -10:00 PM); Everybody Loves Raymond (TV Land, 8:00 PM - 11:00 PM); Good Times (TVOne, 8:00 PM - 3:00 AM);  King of Queens (TV Land, 11:00 PM - 2:00 AM); Barney Miller (Antenna, 11:30 PM); Maude (Antenna, 12:00 AM - 1:00 AM); Alice (Antenna, 1:00 AM - 2:00 AM) 

📺 Johnny Carson (Antenna, 10:00 PM) 'Actress Dyan Cannon; comedian Rodney Dangerfield; journalist Arnaud de Borchgrave; zoologist Jim Fowler.'

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Key Sources: The Futon Critic; Zap2it; Netflix; Wikipedia; Horrornews.net; Sysfy.com; hollywoodreporter.com

⭐: Top Pick
💲: Game show
🎥: Movie
📺: Throwback
✔️: Video/gif/photo included