Thoughts on 11 sketches from The Tracey Ullman Show

 

via Giphy/Courtesy 20th Century Studios

"I'm a middle-aged woman whose buttocks are sagging rapidly. And like it or not, I'm in the market for a man. I do not want to spend the rest of my life alone with my ass."

We're going in the order I watched them, not as they aired.

-- "Everybody, it's time to go/Stand on, getting ready for the show/And if you're thinking that you may or you might/then you're thinking right"

Ginny vs. Roz (Julie Kavner) -- During their father's shiva, the sisters argue over who mom will live with before coming together in their grief.
-- Written by Marc Flanagan, Jay Kogen & Wallace Wolodarsky, directed by Sam Simon.

-- An excellent showcase for Tracey and Julie's chemistry, this sketch got laughs from some relatable humor: Roz's husband Leonard (Sam McMurray) being practically inert as she tends to guests and other duties; well-meaning but tactless people ("Well, I just want to say I'm sorry about your father. ... And about your messy divorce. And about, uh, the fact that your daughter can't get into a decent college."); smokers who figure that switching to menthol will solve the problem. It's a testament to the leading ladies that they can get laughs just by coughing.

-- GREAT lighting. You'd swear Tracey and Julie really were outside.

-- Different Times: Roz is bitter because Ginny stole Harold Eisner from her. "Frizzy hair, glasses, bad skin. He was the best looking kid on Fordham Road." Ginny figures it's not as if she cost Roz a chance with Donald Trump.

-- The bittersweet ending is a heartbreaker. Roz and Ginny claim not to love each other, which causes them to admit their love. Roz eventually agrees for her and Leonard to keep mom for a year. "I just hope you find someone who's half as nice as daddy was." "That's not gonna be easy."

The Sleepover -- Prank calls, secrets and show tunes are part of the night for Francesca and pals.

-- Writer unknown, directed by Ted Bessell.

-- Kellie Martin is back, this time as Francesca's friend Harmony. The other guests are Andrea (Brigid Brannagh) and Andria (Alyson Croft). Croft gets one of the sketch's best lines. "See, I act like I don't know I'm beautiful, but I really know I am."

-- I have mixed feelings about Sam and Dan's portrayals of Francesca's gay dads, William and Dave. On the one hand, I'll applaud any positive gay representation from this era. On the other hand, they're both up to 11. Back to the first point ... I did smile at the idea of William and Dave having met at a masquerade party. Both were dressed as Marie Antoinette.

-- Francesca's secret is that she and cool boy Jerome Harvey (Christian Jacobs) shared a moment when they were briefly alone in the school hallway. It was only a flirtation, and it's only going to be a flirtation, because Francesca doesn't like that Jerome wants to arrange make out time in his building's laundry room.

-- "Jerome, I have a little bit of advice for you: Get a firmer grip on your hormones."

"Tina and the Professor (Dan)" -- She's introduced to her most erogenous zone.

-- Again, comedy from a relatable premise (a lackluster blind date). Harry blows his chance by revealing that with just some pressure on the nape of her neck, Tina can give herself great pleasure.

-- "Hey, I'm lookin' at you 'cause you're cute."

"Kay's Last Stand" -- She fights to ensure insurance for her extremely invalid mother.

-- I first heard of Tracey Ullman vis-à-vis The Simpsons, then by reading the Tracey Takes On tie-in book. While my overall favorite character of Tracey's is Linda Granger, I have a lot of respect for Kay, who has endured over several series and has been the focus of several poignant sketches. There's some of that in this one, particularly when Kay speaks to CEO Ms. Phelps (Julie) about the state of her life.

-- "I'm Kay Clark from distribution. I'm 41 years old and I've worked for this company since I was 17, first in the London branch and now here, in Rhode Island. I've never missed a day, never been a minute late, never asked for a thing, never had a waking thought that wasn't about serving this company and my mother. ... Do you understand what I'm saying?" "Yes. It's tough to meet guys."

-- Kay's annual salary is $22,000. Her mother's annual medical expenses are approximately $247,000. This is almost too serious to be funny. "I'm asking (for help) as proof that there is humanity in corporate America. Some civilizing grace that shelters us from the fires of hell. Some cool drop of kindness to sooth the lives of loyal workers. What do ya say, Mrs. Phelps?"

-- More of the great chemistry between Tracey and Julie. Phelps, after hearing Kay's spiel, first passes herself off as her secretary, then offers to use underhanded means of helping. Kay refuses this on ethical grounds, which gets Phelps to reveal herself and promise that Mrs. Clark will be taken care of. Alone, Kay says that of course she knew she was talking to Phelps, whose picture is all over the front of the annual report.

-- Julie looks particularly stylish in this sketch.

"Tell and Kiss" -- Sandra Decker appeases a ghostwriter (Anna Levine) by embellishing her life story. One of the men named in the book, Roland Diego (Cesar Romero), decides to rekindle an old flame.

-- Written by Simon, directed by Bessell.

-- "It doesn't have to be sex! Drug abuse, child beating, collaborations with the Nazis, these are all crowd-pleasers! ... Damn it. Didn't you boff anybody?" The finished book includes "confessions" of affairs "with everyone from Errol Flynn to Curly Howard." Speaking of Errol, Tracey made her Broadway debut in 1991 with The Big Love, a one-woman show where she played Florence Aadland, mother of his last, teenage girlfriend, Beverly. 

-- Sandra's in need of money. She hasn't worked more than a day or two in years, losing juicy roles to kids like Angela Lansbury. By 1988, The Tracey Ullman Show aired after Murder, She Wrote on Sundays.

-- The sketch picks up with Cesar's entrance. Roland is eager to partially recreate the threesome between he, Sandra and Erich von Stroheim. "You know, at first I didn't remember that I licked the champagne, bubble to bubble, from your heaving, silvery breasts." 

-- As it turns out, Roland knew perfectly well that he and Sandra never previously had sex. "My memory's as sharp as my libido. This was just a charade to get into your bloomers." Sandra is still delighted by the experience.

"The Big Wheel" -- Blanca faces off against millionaire Hugh Jater (Sam) for the chance at $20 million.

-- Written by "Bonita Carlisle" (staff writers), directed by Bessell.

-- If Blanca had $20 million, she'd bring her parents from England. "Yeah. It's a long story and they're really unhappy there." Hugh received a lottery ticket as a gag gift from his secretary. "And if I win, I'm going to give her a day off." The bimbo hostess (Anna) promises to give Hugh great sex if he wins. She's done it before. "Ask Mr. and Mrs. Lucas Stokes of Simi Valley."

-- Fanservice Junction: The hostess asymmetrically padding her dress is followed by Blanca doing cartwheels and revealing her panties. Blanca's first appearance was in a sketch based on a real occurrence in Tracey's life, when she tried desperately to not be flipped while dancing because she wasn't wearing panties.

-- Different Times: Tracey's unique selling point has long been imitation of women from all walks of life, including non-whites. This might be considered problematic to modern audiences. Even in the 1990s, there was apparently some backlash against and eventual retirement of the character of Mrs. Noh Nah Ning, a Chinese doughnut shop proprietor. Anyway, Blanca's Hispanic accent turns "Hugh Jater" into "Jew Hater."

-- Hugh refuses to partner with Blanca. He's rewarded with the wheel landing on $1 million. Blanca initially lands on $10,000, which is still more money than she's ever had, but her excitement causes a final stop on $20 million.

"D.U.I." -- Ms. King has her physical dexterity extensively tested by two officers (Julie and Joseph Malone).

-- Written by Michael Sardo, directed by Bessell.

-- Your results may vary, but something I've liked from what I've seen of The Tracey Ullman Show is that it was an unabashed variety show. Conventional sketches aired alongside song and dance sketches. "C'mon, c'mon, this is Palm Springs. Give her something worthy of the showbiz retirement capital of the world." Good ending: after proving she can emulate the male officer's moves, Ms. King admits to being drunk rather than try to say the female officer's tongue twister. 

-- I'm not sure if Joseph choreographed his and Tracey's routines, or if they came from the show's then-choreographer, Paula Abdul. I'm also not sure if Ms. King is Brenda, who previously appeared as a patient of Dan's "Dr. Gibson".

-- These last five sketches aired as part of The Tracey Ullman Show's best of the third season special in May 1989. I'm guessing the decision was already made not to retain Anna, who joined that season, for the fourth and final season. Despite appearing in two of the special's sketches, she's not in the opening credits.

"Mr. Right" -- The new boyfriend, to the concern of friends Jack (Dan) and Millie (Anna), is Lenny, a ventriloquist dummy.

-- Written by Kogen & Wolodarsky, directed by Bessell?

-- Let it be noted that Tracey passionately kissed a dummy 20-plus years before Emma Stone did on SNL. Lenny is the perfect boyfriend, since he shares his girl's sense of humor, knows what to say to her and anticipates her moves. As funny as Tracey is here, the best performances come from Dan and Anna as they're increasingly horrified by the bizarre situation. Once they leave, Tracey sings "Crazy" while dancing with Lenny.

-- "You're saying that you don't like him?" "Bonnie ... he's 2 feet tall and wood." "Well, Jack's no prize either."

-- Blooper: Tracey refers to her character as Millie when "Lenny" introduces himself. Anna can't seem to decide if Tracey is named Bonnie or Connie.

"9 Minutes and 52 Seconds Over Tokyo" -- The marriage of "America's Sweethearts," Angel & Marty (Dan) Tish, is in jeopardy once a Korean War-era fling (Nobu McCarthy) introduces Marty Jr. (Joey Miyashima).

-- Written by Dick Blasucci & Flanagan, directed by Bessell.

-- I've mentioned this before, but when my dad was a boy, he couldn't stand Steve Lawrence & Eydie Gormé. I think he once told me that he couldn't understand why they were on TV as often as they were. I feel like dad would get a kick out of this sketch, which features the estranged Tishes performing "Bad," initially bombing with the audience of variety-talk host/puppeteer Sonny (Jim Ishida) and ultimately making up in true, showbiz, here's my husband, his illegitimate son and his baby mama fashion.

-- Marty didn't actually serve overseas. As Angel reminds him, he spent two weeks in Tokyo with Bob Hope. "So don't act like you won the Purple Heart, Mr. Big Shot."

"Conjugal Visit" -- Prisoner Anne-Marie is introduced to romance through dancing with longtime pen pal, first time acquaintance and new husband Arthur (Dan).

-- Written by Kogen & Wolodarsky, directed by Bessell?

-- Another touching sketch, with great performances by Tracey and Dan. It starts off with broad Southern accents and comedy (Anne-Marie is really horny). It ends with the couple, having scored five more minutes of alone time, passing on sex in favor of more dancing.

"Special Skills" -- Gigi and fellow potential executives Leonard (Dan) and Pat (Janeen Rae Heller) are each given one minute by Renee Long (Anna) to express themselves creatively with items in a box.

-- Written by Flanagan, directed by Bessell.

-- The special ends with one last musical sketch. After Leonard's less-than-impressive imitation of a duck, Gigi reuses his clothespins, plus bottle caps and exploding caps, to perform a tap dance routine. Gigi is trumped by Pat, who performs "Over the Rainbow" on a saw.

-- Ms. Long ends up choosing Leonard, who she sees will be no threat to her job, nor will inspire any sexual tension. "No threat. Asexual. I'm going straight to the top!"

Thoughts:

-- "I envy your emotional freedom." "I'm gonna pee in my pants."

-- Awards Watch: The show lost the Emmy in 1988 for variety programming and writing, winning the former in 1989. The writing, plus Bessel's direction, were also-rans. Tracey, who won the Golden Globe in 1988, was a nominee in 1989. She also won the American Comedy Award for a backstage special in 1988.

-- Castmember Count: Tracey appeared in all 11 sketches, followed by Dan in 10 (13 if you count the Simpsons shorts), Sam in five, Anna in four, Julie in three (six if you could the Simpsons shorts) and Joseph in two.

-- Hey, It's 1988-89!: Francesca and her friends dance to "Is This Love." The full episode uploads include commercials, which is always fun. I had no idea that at one point, Coca Cola Classic was apparently beating Pepsi by 5 million drinks per day. There's also a promo for a Premiere special promoting Batman, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, Lethal Weapon 2 and The Abyss. (What, no Ghostbusters II?)

-- Hey, It's ...!: Luke Perry in the Mars bar ad. Professor Toru Tanaka appears in both the "Tokyo" sketch and a Colgate ad with Pat Morita. Darryl M. Bell in the Burger King ad.

-- My viewing also included three Simpsons shorts: "The Art Museum" (both Bart and Homer are impressed by a nude painting), "The Shell Game" (Marge, Homer and eventually Bart are outsmarted in the covert theft of a cookie) and "Family Therapy" (They rediscover the joy of laughing together, at the doctor's expense). Tracey's 1988-89 opening sequence included George Clinton, Abdul, the cast and The Simpsons. As she said in Live & Exposed, "I breastfed the little yellow people!"

-- Tracey was ultimately denied $2.25 million in profits from The Simpsons, which she claimed entitlement to as part of her contract with James L. Brooks' Gracie Films. The suit was against 20th Century Fox specifically, although Brooks was among those testifying for the defense. This is most likely an untrue story (and could theoretically go back to the radio era), but Tracey allegedly once shouted that without her, there would be no The Tracey Ullman Show. Brooks responded that without him, there would be no The Show.

-- *Cesar is asked about working in front of a live audience* "I don't like it." "You're putting him off! Go home!"

-- Next: The Taking of Flight 847: The Uli Derickson Story. On deck: The Days and Nights of Molly Dodd.