Well, takes one to know one, Tim ...
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Another Thursday, another long-running multi-camera sitcom ending. Last Man Standing will conclude its run with 194 episodes, just 10 shy of Home Improvement's 204. I'll admit it, Tim Allen was my fantasy TV dad growing up. I might not care for Last Man Standing -- and I discovered something potentially hilarious about tonight's finale -- but I'll give the guy some respect. Unless he still does those cheesy "Pure Michigan" radio ads.
STREAMING
Adventure Time: Distant Lands, 3:01 a.m., HBO Max. "Together Again."
From Cradle to Stage, 3:01 a.m., Paramount+. "Miranda and Bev Lambert."
Hacks, 3:01 a.m., HBO Max. Two episodes available.
Sesame Street, 3:01 a.m., HBO Max. "Abby Airlines." (It can't be much worse than Southwest.)
Gomorrah, 3:01 a.m., HBO Max. Fourth season premiere. The series about organized crime in Naples, Italy, continues. Twelve episodes available.
The Big Shot with Bethenny, 3:01 a.m., HBO Max. First season finale.
Ellen's Next Great Designer, 3:01 a.m., HBO Max. First season finale.
Younger, 3:01 a.m., Paramount+/Hulu. "Fallout."
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TALKIN' 'BOUT TALK
Good Morning America, 7 a.m., ABC. Singer-author Michelle Williams ("Checking In"), author Stacey Swann ("Olympus, Texas") and deals and steals with Tory Johnson.
Today, 7 a.m., NBC. Guests include P!nk, Ted Danson and Mary Steenburgen (Best Summer Ever), Ally Maki (founder of the Asian American Girl Club), Uzo Aduba (In Treatment) and Maya Shankar (the "A Slight Change of Plans" podcast). Also, segments including how a hospital solved a child psychologist shortage and spices for a healthy pantry.
CBS This Morning, 7 a.m., CBS. LeVar Burton guest hosts, with guests including journalist Jodi Kantor and poet Catherine Fisher.
The View, 11 a.m., ABC. "Day of Hot Topics."
The Talk, 2 p.m., CBS. Jerry O'Connell and David Begnaud continue on the panel. Jewel promotes Mental Health Action Day.
Syndicated Corner (times and channels vary):
Live with Kelly and Ryan: Uzo Aduba, spring fling bargains
The Rachael Ray Show: Budget friendly home improvement tips. Rachael makes cannelloni with a spicy red sauce. (Believe it or not, this one wins my crown for the daytime talk shows. GMA was close.)
The Kelly Clarkson Show: Billy Crystal (Here Today) and Olivia Liang (Kung Fu).
The Ellen DeGeneres Show: Jake Tapper (The Lead, "The Devil May Dance"), Tig Notaro (Army of the Dead) and Hunter Metts (American Idol).
The Drew Barrymore Show: Hugh Grant (The Undoing), Nicole Beharie (Solos) and Ross Mathews.
Dr. Phil: "Accusations of Abuse and Tampering with a Corpse: 'What Happened to 'Mother God'?"
NON-PRIMETIME BROADCAST/CABLE SELECTIONS:
Dinner at Eight, 4:15 p.m., TCM. The 1933 classic, airing as an early bird special.
Bohemian Rhapsody, 7 p.m., FX. (With a 10 p.m. encore.)
My Cousin Vinny, 7 p.m., Paramount+
NHL Hockey, 7 p.m., NBC Sports. Pittsburgh Penguins at New York Islanders.
Darkest Hour, 7:35 p.m., HBO Signature.
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8 P.M.
Station 19, ABC. "Comfortably Numb." "Ben finally faces the health issues he has been putting off; Jack and Inara help their neighbor out of a trashy situation; Carina and Maya reevaluate their relationship."
Manifest, NBC. "Compass Calibration." "Ben's pursuit of a vulnerable passenger's calling lands him in the crosshairs of an enemy; Michaela unearths a dangerous arsenal of 828 hate; a seemingly natural disaster leads Saanvi to make a bold move."
Walker, The CW. "A Tale of Two Families." "Flashbacks reveal the days right before and after Emily's death and how the entire Walker family dealt with the sudden, tragic loss."
NBA Basketball, TNT. Teams TBA.
The Bee Gees: How Can You Mend a Broken Heart, HBO. Rerun of the 2020 documentary.
Top Chef, Bravo. "Restaurant Wars Supersized” The eight remaining chefs split into teams and are tasked with creating a Chef's Table restaurant concept, where they must serve a seven-course, high-end tasting menu to the judges and All-Star panel.
Keeping Up With the Kardashians, E. "Keeping Up With the Kids." "When Tristan realizes that Khloé is stressed about her living situation, he takes steps to make her feel more comfortable; the family realizes that it collectively has a problem with negativity stemming from its matriarch, Kris Jenner." (Well, no shit. She's gotta be like Medusa for that clan.)
Movie Night!
10 Things I Hate About You, Freeform
Tombstone, AMC
The Silence of the Lambs, BBC America
I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, CMTV
Sweet Carolina, Hallmark ("A marketing executive (Lacey Chabert, duh!) reconnects with her high school boyfriend after becoming the unexpected guardian of her niece and nephew.")
Revenge Delivered, Lifetime Movie Network. Premiere
Ready or Not, Cinemax
Alvin and the Chipmunks, Nickelodeon
The Waterboy, VH1
Out of Time, The Movie Channel
Wet Hot American Summer, Sho2
Monterrey Pop, TCM
8:30 P.M.
United States of Al, CBS. "Roht/Sweet Bread." The Tiffany Network has an all-rerun lineup tonight, except for this one. "Al meets Ariana, an Afghan woman he wants to date, but is dismayed to learn she has a negative opinion of Afghan interpreters who worked for the United States."
Let's Be Real, FOX. Season finale. It follows a Family Guy rerun, the one where Quahog reconsiders its statue of Pawtucket Pat.
Movie Night!
On the Road, Showcase
X-Men: First Class, HBO Family (8:32 p.m.)
9 P.M.
Last Man Standing, FOX. Series finale. "Baxter Boot Camp" and "Keep On Truckin'." "Mike teaches Kristin about work/life balance; Vanessa and Mandy school Jen on camping; Ed asks Kyle how to get into heaven." And later, "After Mike's beloved truck is stolen, the Baxter family and friends gather together for an emotional goodbye." "Truckin'" was written by Tim Allen, so you just know there's going to be heavy-handed equating of the truck with a way of life. Of note: Tim co-wrote an episode of Home Improvement, but "Truckin'" is apparently his first solo, non-standup script. So, you know, prepare yourself accordingly.
Grey's Anatomy, ABC. "Tradition." "Jackson shares his big news with his colleagues; Koracick and Levi fight to save a pregnant woman's grandfather as she goes into labor; Maggie keeps a watchful eye on Meredith."
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, NBC. "Post-Graduate Psychopath." "Rollins must revisit an old case when a child sent to juvenile detention is released after his 18th birthday."
Legacies, The CW. "One Day You Will Understand." "Faced with a difficult decision regarding one of his students, Alaric looks to Kaleb and Josie for their perspective; Cleo opens up about her past."
Baseball, PBS. "Home." Originally the finale to Ken Burns' documentary miniseries, this included discussion on "the 1975 World Series, Kirk Gibson's World Series home run and Nolan Ryan's career."
Million Dollar Listing New York, 9:15 p.m., Bravo. "House of Style." "Ryan suits up to sell designer Marc Jacobs' swanky West Village townhouse; KJ brings in an interested buyer; Steve whets the appetite with a tasty open house; Tyler is challenged to sell a property across from a police and fire station."
Overserved with Lisa Vanderpump, E. "Beverly Hills Comfort Food." "Lisa proves the best things in life aren't always the fanciest, as she treats Heather, Dr. Terry Dubrow and comic Loni Love to a night of indulgent comfort food, decadent drinks and even a 20-foot beer bong -- filled with champagne, of course."
Movie Night!
Think Like a Man Too, BET
The Money Pit, StarzEncore
The Blackcoat's Daughter, Showtime
Charlie's Angels, Starz (The 2019 one.)
Olympus Has Fallen, Syfy
9:30 P.M.
NHL Hockey, NBC Sports. Vegas Golden Knights at Minnesota Wild.
The Jeffersons, Antenna TV. "My Girl, Louise." "Putting aside her pride, Louise makes a last ditch effort to save the Help Center from financial ruin." Guest starring Amzie Strickland as Louise's nasty boss from her long-ago days as a maid.
Movie Night!
The Sandpiper, TCM
Coming to America, Paramount+
Don Jon, TMCX
Tenet, HBO2 (9:35 p.m.)
The Mummy, HBO Signature (9:40 p.m.)
10 P.M.
Rebel, ABC. "Just Because You're Paranoid." "Rebel and Lana track down a former sales rep who could be the secret weapon in their case against Stonemore Medical; Sean reveals his truth to Ziggy; Nate and Misha grow closer; Cruz has doubts about Angela's intentions."
Law & Order: Organized Crime, NBC. "I Got This Rat." "As Wheatley finalizes plans with a new client, Richie takes a big step in joining the family business."
Everything's Gonna Be Okay, Freeform. "Banded Argiope Spider." "Genevieve changes the narrative; Alex wants some time for self-care; Matilda speaks from the heart; Oscar does something crazy."
Johnny Carson, Antenna TV. George Carlin and Richard Pryor (Bustin' Loose) are the guests on this May 20, 1981 episode.
Movie Night!
Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story, VH1
Devil in a Blue Dress, The Movie Channel
The Exorcist, Showtime (10:35 p.m.)
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LATE NIGHT TALK
Watch What Happens Live, 10:15 p.m., Bravo. P!nk.
Gutfeld!, 11 p.m., Fox News.
The Daily Show Starring Trevor Noah, 11 p.m., Comedy Central.
Conan, 11 p.m., TBS. Bill Burr.
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, 11:34 p.m., NBC. Tina Fey and Dayglow.
Jimmy Kimmel Live!, 11:35 p.m., ABC. Ryan Seacrest, author Yvonne Orji ("Bamboozled by Jesus") and Counting Crows.
The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, 11:35 p.m., CBS. John Krasinski and Yo-Yo Ma.
Late Night with Seth Meyers, 12:36 a.m., NBC. Rob McElhenney and Ryan O'Connell, plus Brian Frasier-Moore sitting in with the 8G Band.
The Late Late Show with James Corden, 12:37 a.m., CBS. Hank Azaria and Sara Bareilles.
Nightline, 12:37 a.m., ABC
A Little Late with Lilly Singh, 1:36 a.m., NBC. Ryan O'Connell.
LATE NIGHT PICKS!
The Conversation, 11:45 p.m., The Movie Channel
The War of the Roses, 3:30 a.m., Starz
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