Everybody's Got Something Tonight!!!! You just know tv is slowly stirring itself awake from its winter slumber when there's actual new programming happening on most of the networks. (Huzzah!) This is what's on for January 7th 2019
8:00
NCIS (CBS): Gibbs must face the reality of his actions after he assists Ziva with the one thing she said she would need to do before returning to her family. (So i guess their winter finale was a cliffhanger episode then???)
Ellen's Game of Games (NBC): Ellen's gameshow featuring many made up games a la The Price Is Right (Sorry Jay S but i needed a point of comparison) returns with new episodes tonight for what's apparently the 3rd January in a row. (Wikipedia actually had the previous 2 seasons premiering mid December--but both of them aired thru January and February) The 8:00 episode is titled "It'd Been A Hard Maze Night" (I Get It!)
The Resident (FOX): After being fired fairly arbitrary at the end of the last episode Dr. Conrad Hawkins has difficulty figuring out his next step (he was fired because he lied to a transplant board about a teenage recipient having tried to kill himself because he knows that they wouldn't approve a transplant with a patient who was suicidal at one point--however this wasn't an iron clad rule but the company that took over the hospital had been looking for any reason whatsoever to fire him because they had him labeled as a potential whistle blower) (I know you all were dying to know that) Meanwhile Cain (Morris Chestnut) puts the docs on a commission based pay system (he's the worst!)
Jeopardy's Greatest Of All Time (ABC): Ken Jennings, James Holtzhauer, and Brad Rutter all face off in this three night primetime Jeopardy event! (WOOO! Primetime Jeopardy Bitches!!!!!)
Batwoman (The CW): Rerun of episode 2 of "Crisis on Infinite Earths" (This one had Batwoman going to an alternative Earth version of Gotham City and it also featured Jon Cryer's Lex Luthor hopping thru various alternatie Earths trying to kill each version of Superman he can find including Smallville's Tom Welling in one scene!)
Finding Your Roots with Henry Louis Gates (PBS): Season 6 premieres tonight with Sterling K Brown, Jon Batiste (CBS!), and Sasheer Zamata all tracing their ancestry. (I wonder if this will inspire a future plotline for Brown's character on"This Is Us" now--cause i could see Randall doing this and then spending an episode trying to track down a still living relative he never knew existed)
Unleashing Mr. Darcy (Hallmark): Elizabeth decides to show off her dog in a dog competition, but she ends up clashing with an arrogant and complicated judge named Donovan Darcy. (They could've called it Pride and Prejudice and Dogshows!)
9:00
FBI (CBS): After a businessman with a long history of harassment claims is found dead, the team suspects the man could've been murdered by one of his accusers which would mean that there are numerous suspects to cross off. (Maybe they could do a spin-off series where it focuses entirely on the people whose job it is to cross-check everyone's alibis--they could call it "Cross-Checkers")
Ellen's Game of Games (NBC): This hour of fun and games is titled "So Put Another Coin In the Blaster Baby" (This one i don't get--its gotta be another song title parody right?)
Gordon Ramsey's 24 Hours To Hell and Back (FOX): This Ramsey show is back tonight for a 3rd season--(assuming this is only airing here until Empire comes back at the beginning of March since they still have 10 episodes to go) Tonight Gordon must revamp Lowery's Seafood where he finds 2 brothers at odds and a dedicated team confused about whom to look to for leadership. (shrugs)
Mixed-ish (ABC): In the wake of the Challenger disaster, Rainbow and family handle their grief in different ways; Denise realizes that life is too short so she vows to right the wrongs in her life. (The episode is titled "When Doves Cry")
Black Lightning (The CW): Even tho it only connects to Crisis on Infinite Earths in its very last minute, a rerun of the last episode that this show had aired back in December runs here once again after the 2nd installment of Crisis just like it did originally! (To be fair Black Lightning does play a key role in the 3rd installment of Crisis so i guess it makes sense, but again Crisis doesn't actually affect this show here until like its last 30 seconds maybe???)
Dave Chappelle: The Mark Twain Prize (PBS): The comedian receives the noted prize for humor from the Kennedy Center in D.C. (which is where Dave's from originally so he's probably super psyched to be back home where he started!) For some reason PBS has this airing in January when it normally airs in like November. This btw runs for 90 minutes so set your DVR's/viewing schedules accordingly.
Gomer Pyle (MeTV): Gomer is upset after pictures he posed for on the beach are altered to make it look like he's fooling around with a bunch of beautiful women. (No comment!)
Curse of Oak Island (History): After 152 years, the Money Pit may no longer be lost! (Finally, its about time someone found that long buried DVD of the Tom Hanks/Shelly Long classic)
Chopped (Food): The contestants must prepare dishes involving both sweet and salty ingredients; one round features a Moroccan pie and a sugary take on bacon. (Sugar Bacon??? Isn't the whole point of bacon that its like the opposite of sugary sweet?)
Life Below Zero (Nat Geo): Endless daylight has the citizenry making repairs to essential tools to help them ward off insomnia. (sounds good???)
Moonshiners (Discovery): Tim makes backwoods shine with Tickle for the first time in years; Mark and Digger's operation comes under threat; and 2 Tennessee shiners are about to get busted. (Ghost busted???? "I ain't afraid of no moonshine!")
9:30
Black-ish (ABC): Bow takes Diane to a salon and wants to use the time together as a bonding opportunity; Diane is conflicted about relaxing her hair and embarks on a hair journey; Dre and Junior compete to throw the best barbecue. (Hair Journey??? Thank God we got a barbecue subplot in here!)
Green Acres (MeTV): Eb is planning to make a profit off of his last minute wedding. (Ohh you know how that Eb rolls!)
10:00
FBI Most Wanted (CBS): This brand new spin-off series premieres tonight starring Nip/Tuck's Julian McMahon as Jess Lecroix (oy that name) who is the head of the Fugitive Task Force--a division of the FBI. This week the team tracks a doctor who is involved over his head in organized crime and drugs and is on the run after a phone call records audio evidence of him murdering his wife. (So i take it we're not supposed to have any sympathy or think of the guy being chased down as being innocent in any way, shape, or form then--which i guess makes sense as this is CBS, and they don't really do ambiguity in their procedurals all that often) (speaking of which--CBS! CBS! CBS!)
Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (NBC): Another new series debuts tonight--this one in a much lighter/whimsical tone---Jane Levy (star of one time much missed ABC sitcom Suburgatory) plays Zoey who is an introverted computer programmer living in San Francisco who begins to hear the innermost thoughts of the people around her thru song. (So she sees the people around her bursting into song even tho no one else sees this) (This honestly sounds like it should be airing on The CW and not NBC, but you never know--although to be fair the only reason i didn't pick it for my CL ballot is cause i just didn't think to soooo)
Emergence (ABC): After months of dead ends, the Evans' family receives new info that could finally lead them to track down the still missing Piper; Ed helps Mia as she tries to send Piper a message; Alex and Chris stumble upon a mysterious shipment in the harbor. (Could it possibly be related to Piper??? I mean the other two plotlines are)
Kings of Pain (History): The guys encounter bullet ants and a piranha; Caveman Rob dips his blood covered arm in a piranha tank for some reason. (makes sense)
Famously Afraid (Travel): My favorite show to summarize once again---Ty Pennington rennovates a haunted house; Amber Rose discovers a gift of clairvoyance; and Meta World Peace checks into an infamous hotel. (Is the hotel from The Shining??? I could see Meta World Peace checking in there expecting a good night's rest)
Running Wild with Bear Grylls (Nat Geo): Rock climber Alex Honnold joins Bear in an expedition thru the Swiss Alps. (Riiiiiiicolaaaaaaaaa)
Guardians of the Glades (Discovery): Dusty makes a plan to stop invasive pythons from heading north. (Wouldn't the cold stop them from heading north? Oh you mean north Florida--yeah i guess you should probably stop that from happening)
THAT"S IT FOR ME HERE---REMEMBER TO TIP YOUR WAITSTAFF! GOODNIGHT SEATTLE WE LOVE YOU!!! (FRASIER HAS LEFT THE BUILDING)
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