Sunday, December 8, 2019

A MarkInTexas Made-For-TV Christmas: Kelly Clarkson's Cautionary Christmas Music Tale (2013)

Most variety shows and specials, whether they are Christmas specials or not, occasionally (or frequently) indulge in a little bit of meta, during which we get to follow the host talks to the big guest star, or the show's other performers, or a "crew" person, while everyone pretends this is a private conversation that we're getting to eavesdrop on, and not a scripted moment that's very much part of the show.

While lots of specials have used their meta bits to "show" the decision to put on a special, the idea of one that is entirely about the making of itself (and about selling albums) is a rather unique concept.  I can't think of another example, though I'm sure they're out there.  While I can think of performers who would be less likely than Kelly Clarkson to do a wholly meta special, that list is not a long one.  Then again, maybe it shouldn't be a surprise.  Clarkson, after all, came to fame from winning the first season of American Idol, and she is one of a very small number of performers from Idol and its numerous clones to have a sustained career.  So, for her to do a very meta Christmas is not nearly out of character as I thought it would have been.

A number of actors with "nice guy" images like to seek out villain roles on occasion.  It's rare, however, for a performer to play themselves negatively.  Even more interesting than Clarkson's meta special, Kelly Clarkson's Cautionary Christmas Music Tale, which was to promote her then new Christmas album Wrapped in Red, was her decision to portray herself as a friendless jerk.

To be fair, the special does put an extra layer by having a young girl narrate while reading a storybook.  So, this isn't the "real" Kelly Clarkson, but merely a character that just happens to be a popular singer who just happens to be played by a popular singer with the exact same name.  Whether viewers picked up on that distinction, I'll leave to others to decide.

The special opens with Clarkson meeting with her manager (Ken Jeong) who encourages her to do something to get her name out there (such as, perhaps, go on The Voice--the most prominent Idol ripoff--ironically, she wouldn't become a judge on The Voice until several years later).  She settles on a Christmas special, and an NBC exec (William Shatner) greenlights it only if Clarkson can promise it will be star-studded.  The problem, as stated above, is that everyone seemingly hates Clarkson, including Reba McEntire and Trisha Yearwood, who only agree to join Clarkson on "Silent Night" after Clarkson blackmails them.  It's a bizarre juxtaposition to see the blackmail scene (which has Yearwood and McEntire badmouthing Clarkson to her face, then Clarkson producing her blackmail photos, then cut to the concert hall where the three duet all lovey-dovey like, then cut backstage where Yearwood and McEntire glare witheringly at Clarkson as they leave.  It's all quite amusing, but definitely an odd vibe for "Silent Night".

I should probably mention the music, which is the reason people are ostensibly turning into the show.  It was performed live on stage in Vegas in front of a packed house, and Clarkson puts on a good show, as she runs through a number of cuts from her album, mostly covers, but also her original songs "Wrapped in Red" and "Underneath the Tree", both of which are OK songs, if not exactly timeless classics.  I should mention that, given that the special was to promote the album Wrapped in Red, most of her costumes, including everything she wears onstage, is some variation of that color.

Getting back to the story, there's just more abuse for our girl Kelly, as she gets hard-hitting questions from, of all people, Jay Leno.  A number of reasonably famous people cameo in scenes that probably took five minutes to shoot, to basically decline and insult poor Kelly.  Meanwhile, in a running gag, Kelly doesn't want the one celeb who has turned out, Blake Shelton, and sticks him with menial tasks.

Does Kelly eventually make up for her shallowness?  Of course she does, by singing "White Christmas" at a homeless shelter where her former assistant (Jai Rodriguez) is living after she fired him in a fit of pique. 

While the special is supposed to be a very loose retelling of A Christmas Carol, I can't emphasize how bizarre this show is, as we're supposed to go from loving Kelly as she performs, to more or less hating her as she's the butt of jokes or acts like a shallow jerk.  The tonal shifts are rather whiplash-educing.  That said, I sort of have to recommend it, because it is so original in its oddity.  After all, Kelly Clarkson's Cautionary Christmas Music Tale might be the only Christmas special ever to feature blackmail as the prelude to a number about the Nativity. 

Next time: One of, if not the oldest, Christmas specials still in existence.

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