What's On Tonight (Friday): What If... There Was a Second Season?

      

What If...?

I know the first season wasn't all that great.  I did enjoy the final crossover episode, but I was just happy to have a story that wasn't a direct riff on the films.  If the titles are any indication, this year will probably be more of the same, but there are a couple outliers that might be fun.  Disney is premiering all nine episodes over the next nine days, which is a pretty great idea for this time of year.  Maybe it'll even be a good enough idea that people will decide to check it out even if they didn't like the first one.  It's a bold move, Cotton.

TOP PICK

⭐🦸‍♂️ What If...? (Disney+, 3:01 AM) SEASON TWO PREMIERE. Season two titles include What If... Nebula Joined the Nova Corps?, What If... Happy Hogan Saved Christmas?, and What If... The Avengers Assembled in 1602?

*Saltburn has its streaming premiere today on Amazon.  I had heard this movie's name so many times over the last few weeks I had assumed it was a much bigger hit than it is.  Still, I wouldn't have heard of it at all had it not been in theaters first.  It's almost like there are good reasons to put your movies in theaters first.

*Amazon also has a new French series called Escort Boys.  It's basically What If... The Full Monty but with Sexy French Guys?

*Tubi has the streaming premiere of the documentary film Satan Wants You.  I originally made some assumptions about what this film is based on its title and that it will be streaming on Tubi.  I am happy to report that the trailer makes it clear this is actually about the Satanic panic back in the 80s.  As a person who grew up in a small farm town in the Midwest in the 80s, I have no longing to relive any of that bullshit.

PREMIERES

Saltburn

🎥 Saltburn (Amazon, 12:01 AM) STREAMING PREMIERE. 'Struggling to find his place at Oxford University, student Oliver Quick finds himself drawn into the world of the charming and aristocratic Felix Catton, who invites him to Saltburn, his eccentric family's sprawling estate, for a summer never to be forgotten.'

🔔 Escort Boys (Amazon, 12:01 AM) SEASON ONE. 'In Camargue, four guys in dire straits turn to escorting to save their childhood beekeeping estate. Coached by the group's little sister who manages this unique 'business' in the region, they will have to service women and, through their desires... learn to be men of today.'

🎥 Curry & Cyanide - The Jolly Joseph Case (Netflix, 3:01 AM) 'This true-crime documentary investigates six shocking deaths in the same family and the woman at the center of the unbelievable case: Jolly Joseph.'

🔔 Gyeongseong Creature (Netflix, 3:01 AM) PART ONE. 'In the spring of 1945, a grim era of bitter darkness, a young man and woman struggle for survival while fighting monsters born out of human greed.'

🎥 Satan Wants You (Tubi, 3:01 AM) 'Tells the untold story of how the Satanic Panic of the 1980s was ignited by "Michelle Remembers", a lurid memoir by psychiatrist Larry Pazder and his patient Michelle Smith. This film digs deep into the roots of moral panics and cult conspiracies, showing how these events still affect and distort our reality today.'

🏠 Homes That Make You Go Wow (HGTV, 9:00 PM) 'From everyday houses stripped down to the studs turned showstoppers to mansions and grand one-of-a-kind spaces, David Bromstad puts on his diamonds and tours big and interesting homes.'

🎄GET YOUR XMAS PREMIERES WHILE YOU CAN!🎄

🎄😂 LOL: Last One Laughing Germany (Amazon, 12:01 AM) "Xmas Special"

🎄🔔 Sago Mini Friends (Apple, 12:01 AM) "New Year's Steve"

🎄🎄 The 25th Annual A Home for the Holidays (CBS, 8:00 PM) 'Uplifting stories of adoption from foster care enhanced with performances by top artists at The Bram Goldsmith Theater at the Wallis Annenberg Center for the Performing Arts in Los Angeles; Katharine McPhee hosts.'

🎄💀 A Shattered Christmas (ID, 10:00 PM) 'The chilling murder of a local Maryland pastor on Christmas Eve in 1994 sets an entire town on edge and sends detectives on the hunt for a heartless killer.'

RETURNING SHOWS

🔔 Sister Wives (TLC, 9:00 PM) SPECIAL PRESENTATION.

Gyeongseong Creature

STREAMING

🔔 Reacher (Amazon, 12:01 AM) 

🚀 For All Mankind (Apple, 12:01 AM) "Crossing the Line" 

👹 Monarch: Legacy of Monsters (Apple, 12:01 AM) "Will the Real May Please Stand Up?" 

💖 Love Island: Australia (Hulu, 3:01 AM) 

🔔 The Curse (Paramount, 3:01 AM) "Self-Exclusion" 

😈 My Demon (Netflix, 8:01 AM) 

🔔 Undead Unluck (Hulu, 2:01 PM) 

LIVE SPORTSBALL TODAY/TONIGHT

🏀 NBA G League Basketball: Greensboro Swarm vs. Salt Lake City Stars (ESPNU, 1:30 PM)

⚽ Premier League Soccer: Aston Villa vs. Sheffield United (USA, 3:00 PM)

🏀 College Basketball: Hawaiian Airlines Diamond Head Classic, First Semifinal: Teams TBA (ESPN2, 5:00 PM)

🏀 College Basketball: SMU at Murray State (CBSSN, 6:00 PM)

🏈 College Football: Union Home Mortgage Gasparilla Bowl: Georgia Tech vs. UCF (ESPN, 6:30 PM)

🏀 Boy's High School Basketball: Teams TBA (ESPNU, 7:00 PM)

🏀 NBA G League Basketball: Showcase Cup Tournament, Final: Teams TBA (ESPN2, 7:00 PM)

🏀 NBA Basketball: Denver Nuggets vs. Brooklyn Nets (NBA TV, 7:30 PM)

🏀 College Basketball: Maryland at UCLA (ESPN2, 9:00 PM)

🏀 Boy's High School Basketball: Teams TBA (ESPNU, 9:00 PM)

🏀 NBA Basketball: Washington Wizards at Golden State Warriors (ESPN, 10:00 PM)

🏀 College Basketball: Hawaiian Airlines Diamond Head Classic, Second Semifinal: Teams TBA (ESPN2, 11:00 PM)

🏀 College Basketball: Hawaiian Airlines Diamond Head Classic, Second Consolation Semifinal: Teams TBA (ESPN2, 1:00 AM)

Curry & Cyanide - The Jolly Joseph Case

🕗 EARLY PRIMETIME 🕗

😂 Ridiculousness (MTV, 7:00 PM) 

🕗 8:00 EASTERN / 🕖 7:00 CENTRAL

🔔 Penn & Teller: Fool Us (CW, 8:00 PM) 'Featured magicians include Benjamin Barnes, Hara, Helen Coghlan and Daniel K.'

🔔 Power Book III: Raising Kanan (Starz, 8:00 PM) 'New business ventures take shape for the Thomas family, but the outlook is bleaker for the Mathis brothers as Ronnie's patience runs out; Raq makes a risky move for Kanan's obedience.'

🎄🎄 The 25th Annual A Home for the Holidays (CBS, 8:00 PM) 
🤼‍♂️ WWE's Friday Night Smackdown (Fox, 8:00 PM) 
💰 Gold Rush (Discovery, 8:00 PM) 
🚗 Roadkill Garage (Motortrend, 8:00 PM)
😂 Ridiculousness (MTV, 8:00 PM) 
💖 Ready to Love: Make a Move (OWN, 8:00 PM) 
🏈 The World According to Football (Showtime, 8:00 PM) 

🕗 9:00 EASTERN / 🕖 8:00 CENTRAL

👽 The Unexplained (History, 9:00 PM) SEASON FINALE. 'Since the dawn of humanity, tales of monstrous creatures lurking in the shadows have sparked both fascination and fear; discussing the potential that these stories have elements of reality to them.'

💰 Bering Sea Gold (Discovery Channel, 9:00 PM) SEASON FINALE. 
🏠 Homes That Make You Go Wow (HGTV, 9:00 PM) 
🚗 Hot Rod Garage (Motortrend, 9:00 PM) 
😂 Ridiculousness (MTV, 9:00 PM) 
🔔 Belle Collective (OWN, 9:00 PM) 
🔔 Sister Wives (TLC, 9:00 PM) 
💖 Love After Lockup: Life After Lockup (WE, 9:00 PM) 
🔔 20/20 (ABC, 9:01 PM) 

Satan Wants You

🕗 10:00 EASTERN / 🕖 9:00 CENTRAL

👽 The Unbelievable with Dan Aykroyd (History, 10:04 PM) 'A million bats with tiny bombs strapped to their chests, inflatable tanks, robot assassins, bazooka Vespas, and war dolphins; these weapons, and others, pushed the boundaries of "possible" in the weirdest ways ever.'

💀 Dateline NBC (NBC, 10:00 PM) 
🎄💀 A Shattered Christmas (ID, 10:00 PM) 
🚗 Super Street Garage (Motortrend, 10:00 PM) SEASON FINALE. 
🤼‍♂️ All Elite Wrestling: Rampage (TNT, 10:00 PM) 
💖 Love After Lockup: Innocent After Lockup (WE, 10:30 PM) 

LATE NIGHT

🔔 The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon (NBC, 11:34 PM) 'Actress Emma Stone; actor Kiefer Sutherland; comic Jay Jurden.'

🔔 Late Night with Seth Myers (NBC, 12:35 PM) 'Gov. Gavin Newsom (D-Calif.); actress Danielle Brooks; Alexander Stewart performs; Marcus Gilmore sits in with the 8G Band.'

🤼‍♂️ All Elite Wrestling: Rampage (TNT, 11:00 PM) 
🔔 The Late Show with Stephen Colbert (CBS, 11:35 PM) 
🔔 Jimmy Kimmel Live! (ABC, 12:05 PM) 
🔔 Nightline (ABC, 12:37 AM)
🔔 The Late Late Show with James Corden (CBS, 12:37 AM) 

📺Broadcast/Cable/Satellite - RETRO BINGE📺

The Andy Griffith Show (Sundance, 6:00 AM - 9:30 AM); Law & Order (Pop, 6:00 AM - 8:00 PM); M*A*S*H* (TVLand, 8:30 AM - 11:00 AM); Roseanne (CMT, 9:00 AM - 12:00 PM); Living Single (TVOne, 9:00 AM - 12:00 PM); Hawaii Five-0 (Ion, 10:00 AM - 2:00 AM); South Park (Comedy Central, 10:10 AM - 2:00 PM); Gunsmoke (TVLand, 12:00 PM - 4:00 PM); Seinfeld (Comedy Central, 2:00 PM - 6:00 PM); The Andy Griffith Show (TVLand, 4:00 PM - 7:00 PM); Family Ties (Antenna, 5:00 PM - 6:00 PM); One Day at a Time (Antenna, 6:00 PM - 7:00 PM); The Office (Comedy Central, 6:00 PM - 1:00 AM); Three's Company (Antenna, 7:00 PM - 8:00 PM); Everybody Loves Raymond (TVLand, 7:00 PM - 11:00 PM); The Jeffersons (Antenna, 8:00 PM -9:00 PM); Barney Miller (Antennae, 9:00 PM - 10:00 PM); The King of Queens (TVLand, 11:00 PM - 2:00 AM); Designing Women (Antenna, 11:30 PM); Becker (Antenna, 12:00 AM - 1:00 AM); Wings (Antennae, 1:00 AM - 2:00 AM); Alice (Antenna, 2:00 AM - 3:00 AM); Mom (TVLand, 2:00 AM - 4:00 AM); Benson (Antenna, 3:00 AM - 4:00 AM)

📺 Johnny Carson (Antenna, 10:00 PM) 'Actor John Davidson; comedian Richard Pryor; actress Darleen Carr; actor Michael J. Fox.'

Escort Boys

Key Sources: The Futon Critic; Zap2it; Netflix; Wikipedia; Horrornews.net; Sysfy.com; hollywoodreporter.com

⭐: Top Pick
💲: Game show
🎥: Movie
📺: Throwback
✔️: Video/gif/photo included