What's On Tonight (Friday): Still Laying That Foundation (Oh, My)

    

Foundation

I'm not saying I'm predictable, but I came up with the headline for today before going back to the WOT for Foundation's season one premiere date back in 2021 to find I had made pretty much the same joke then.  Perhaps I'm less predictable than lazy, or perhaps the reason I'm predicable is my laziness.  Whatever, I regret nothing.

TOP PICK

⭐🚀 Foundation✔️ (Apple, 12:01 AM) SEASON TWO PREMIERE. 'More than a century after the season one finale, tension mounts throughout the galaxy as the Cleons unravel and a vengeful queen plots to destroy Empire from within. Hari, Gaal, and Salvor discover a colony of Mentalics with psionic abilities that threaten to alter psychohistory itself. The Foundation has entered its religious phase, promulgating the Church of Seldon throughout the Outer Reach and inciting the Second Crisis: war with Empire.'

Elsewhere...

*Imagine Dragons is one of those bands whose songs I've probably heard but had no idea who I was listening to.  They have a concert premiering on Hulu today.  Perhaps it's time for me to associate the songs with the band?  Yeah, no thanks.

*Roku has a new series called Lincoln Log Masters that is not really about Lincoln Logs, but rather a company that makes log cabins.  It's the only log cabin company with the Lincoln Log stamp of approval, because we're supposed to be impressed by that.  I'd be more impressed if this was a competition show where people build immense structures from actual Lincoln Logs.  The Taj Mahal, the Empire State Building, the Great Wall of China, etc.  And life size or GTFO.

*Remember Bird Box?  Remember Sandra Bullock and monsters that drove people crazy if they looked at them for some reason?  Well, prepare yourself because the Bird Box has decided to go international with Bird Box Barcelona.  That kind of alliteration can only indicate a quality film.

*Last week's Strange New Worlds was a real nice throwback to the original series.  The events are not only related to an incident referenced in The Cage, but the entire story would have fit right in on the original series.  And it was good!  Mount is becoming my favorite captain since Sisko.

*Last week's Secret Invasion was interesting, but it's not really coming together.  We're halfway through the season and I still don't know what they are actually going for here.  I get that Fury has to do a lot of stupid shit so he can seem brilliant when he finally comes out on top, but he is acting really fucking stupid for the world's greatest spy.  Still, I do love his scenes with Mendelsohn, and the villain is a good one, I just don't see how any of this will be resolved in a satisfying way.

PREMIERES

Imagine Dragons Live in Vegas

🎵 Imagine Dragons Live in Vegas✔️(Hulu, 12:01 AM) SPECIAL PRESENTATION. 'Far from the days of playing in bars and casinos across the Strip, Imagine Dragons return home to perform at Las Vegas’ largest stage, Allegiant Stadium, in a concert film that showcases the band’s rise to fame and the city that helped shape their sound.'

⛸ Yuzuru Hanyu Ice Story 2023 “Gift” At Tokyo Dome✔️(Disney+, 3:01 AM) 'The first-ever solo ice show at Tokyo Dome, “GIFT,” is a story that self-portrays Yuzuru Hanyu’s life and future on the ice. This piece is produced by professional skater Yuzuru Hanyu, and directed by MIKIKO, who is known for using the latest technology stage production.'

🎥 Time Zone (Max, 3:01 AM) 'Contestants compete against the clock and the Time Master in a real life video game.'

🎥 Bird Box Barcelona✔️(Netflix, 3:01 AM) 'As a mysterious force decimates humanity, a sinister new threat grows in this Barcelona-set film that expands the story of the blockbuster "Bird Box."'

🍴 Five Star Chef✔️(Netflix, 3:01 AM) SEASON ONE. 'Seven professional chefs compete to bring their fine-dining concept to the historic Palm Court restaurant at London's luxurious Langham Hotel.'

🎥 Love Tactics 2 (Netflix, 3:01 AM) 'Asli thinks marriage is a scam, and says so. But when her beau Kerem unexpectedly agrees, she goes to great lengths to manipulate him into proposing.'

🏠 Lincoln Log Masters✔️(Roku, 3:01 AM) SEASON ONE. 'Follows Cody, Wilson and the Knaughty Log Crew - the only log home building company with the Lincoln Log stamp of approval - as they design, build, break down, and rebuild epic log homes and structures across Oregon.'

🎥 Quicksand (Shudder, 3:01 AM) 'Quicksand follows an American couple on the brink of divorce who travel to Colombia for a work conference. While on a hike through the rainforest, a storm causes them to become trapped in a pit of quicksand. Unable to move, it becomes a struggle for survival as they battle the elements of the jungle and a venomous snake in order to escape.'

🎥 Meet the Killer Parents (Tubi, 3:01 AM) 'When the daughter of a wealthy family dies, they come up with the perfect plan to replace her: drug and groom the son’s girlfriend. They don’t plan on her trying to escape.'

RETURNING SHOWS

The Summer I Turned Pretty

🔔 The Summer I Turned Pretty✔️(Amazon, 12:01 AM) SEASON TWO PREMIERE.

🔔 The Beauty Queen of Jerusalem (Netflix, 3:01 AM) SEASON TWO.

💖 Too Hot to Handle (Netflix, 3:01 AM) SEASON FIVE PREMIERE.

STREAMING

🔔 Tom Clancy's Jack Ryan (Amazon, 12:01 AM) SERIES FINALE. 

🔔 The Crowded Room (Apple, 12:01 AM) "Reunion" 

🔔 Swagger (Apple, 12:01 AM) "Through the Fire" 

⚖ Tribunal Justice (Freevee, 12:01 AM) 

💖 Love Island (UK) (Hulu, 3:01 AM) 

💖 Love Allways (Paramount, 3:01 AM) 

🔔 RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars (Paramount, 3:01 AM) 

🔔 RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars Untucked (Paramount, 3:01 AM) 

🔔 Martha Gardens (Roku, 3:01 AM) 

👮‍♂️ Crime Cam 24/7 (Fox Nation, 6:00 PM) 

Bird Box Barcelona

LIVE SPORTSBALL TODAY/TONIGHT

🚴‍♀️ 2023 Tour de France: Stage 12 (USA, 2:00 AM) 

🏌️‍♂️ PGA Tour Golf: Barbasol Championship, Second Round (Golf, 4:00 PM)

🏀 NBA Summer League Basketball: Oklahoma City Thunder vs. Washington Wizards (ESPN2, 5:00 PM)

🏎 NASCAR Xfinity Racing Series: Ambetter Health 200, Qualifying (USA, 5:00 PM)

⚾ Friday Night Baseball: Los Angeles Dodgers at New York Mets (Apple, 7:00 PM)

⚾ Friday Night Baseball: San Francisco Giants at Pittsburgh Pirates (Apple, 7:00 PM)

🥒 Pickleball: Pickle4 Ballpark Series: Fenway Park (CBSSN, 7:00 PM)

🏀 NBA Summer League Basketball: Boston Celtics vs. New York Knicks (ESPN2, 7:00 PM)

🥊 One Championship Special: One Fight Night 12: Superlek vs. Khalilov (Amazon, 8:00 PM)

🏀 WNBA Basketball:  (Ion, 8:00 PM)

🏀 NBA Summer League Basketball: Miami Heat vs. Denver Nuggets (ESPN2, 9:00 PM)

🏀 NBA Summer League Basketball: Utah Jazz vs. Phoenix Suns (ESPN2, 11:00 PM)

Five Star Chef

🕗 MIDNIGHT EASTERN / 🕗 11:00 CENTRAL

🔔 My Adventures with Superman (Adult Swim, 12:00 AM) 'Lois wants to interview Superman and Clark must figure out how to help her while protecting his secret identity! Meanwhile, criminal ring INTERGANG gets their hands on unstable weapons, and a mysterious organization plots in the shadows.'

🕗 EARLY PRIMETIME

🔔 Craig of the Creek (Cartoon Network, 5:00 PM) 'The epic Heart of the Forest quest ends.'

🧽 Kamp Koral: SpongeBob's Under Years (Nickelodeon, 5:00 PM) 'Patrick's dad unexpectedly visits Kamp Koral; SpongeBob, Patrick and Sandy befriend a visiting ghost camper.'

🏠 The Loud House (Nickelodeon, 6:00 PM) 

🕗 8:00 EASTERN / 🕖 7:00 CENTRAL

🔨 Tough as Nails (CBS, 8:00 PM) 'Season 3 winner Lia Mort returns to guide the crews through a series of challenges at a local apple orchard; teams race to gather as many bushels of apples as quickly as possible.'

⚖ Family Law (CW, 8:00 PM) 'Abby and Daniel represent a trans teenager whose grandfather is blocking her access to hormone replacement therapy.'

🔔 Outlander (Starz, 8:01 PM) 'At Ticonderoga, Jamie and Claire prepare for an imminent British assault; Roger compiles information about time travel while Brianna earns the respect of her coworkers.'

🤼‍♂️ WWE's Friday Night Smackdown (Fox, 8:00 PM) 
🔔 Villains of Valley View (Disney Channel, 8:00 PM) 
🔔 Ridiculousness (MTV, 8:00 PM) 
💖 Ready to Love (OWN, 8:00 PM) 
👮‍♂️ On Patrol: First Shift (Reelz, 8:00 PM) 
👻 Pretty Freekin Scary (Disney Channel, 8:30 PM) 

Lincoln Log Masters

🕗 9:00 EASTERN / 🕖 8:00 CENTRAL

🔔 Moonshine (CW, 9:00 PM) 'Lidia takes the reins of the annual Goat Roast and insists on a glamp-y upgrade and a fancy new name; Rhian draws a bloody line in the sand.'

🍴 Diners, Drive-ins & Dives (Food, 9:00 PM) 'Guy Fieri revisits a DDD stop in Victorville serving sandwiches, a Garden Grove joint with chile verde and a Los Angeles spot with tampiquenas.'

🔔 Run the World (Starz, 9:01 PM) SEASON FINALE. 'Renee offers to help Jason with the band's listening party; Whitney turns to Ola for support, but the question still remains whether they can ever be friends; Barb takes her own advice that it's better to act while you can than live with regret.'

💀 Dateline NBC (NBC, 9:00 PM) 
💰 Hoffman Family Gold (Discovery Channel, 9:00 PM) 
👻 Pretty Freekin Scary (Disney Channel, 9:00 PM) 
🏠 100 Day Dream Home (HGTV, 9:00 PM) 
👽 Ancient Aliens (History, 9:00 PM) 
🔔 Ridiculousness (MTV, 9:00 PM) 
🔔 Belle Collective (OWN, 9:00 PM) 
💀 The Real Murders of Orange County (Oxygen, 9:00 PM) 
👮‍♂️ On Patrol: Live (Reelz, 9:00 PM) 
🎥 Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs (Shudder, 9:00 PM) 
🤮 Mama June: From Not to Hot (WE, 9:00 PM) SEASON FINALE. 
🔔 20/20 (ABC, 9:01 AM) 

🕗 10:00 EASTERN / 🕖 9:00 CENTRAL

🤼‍♂️ All Elite Wrestling: Rampage (TNT, 10:00 PM) 
💰 Gold Rush: Freddy Dodge's Mine Rescue (Discovery, 10:01 PM) 
👽 The Proof is Out There (History, 10:03 PM) 

LATE NIGHT

🔔 The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon (NBC, 11:34 PM) 'Actor James Corden; actress Jenna Ortega; comic Mike Feeney.'

🔔 Late Night with Seth Myers (NBC, 12:37 PM) 'Actor Andy Samberg; actor Chris O'Dowd; Fred Armisen sits in with the 8G Band.'

💰 Outback Opal Hunters (Discovery Channel, 11:08 PM) X
🔔 Jimmy Kimmel Live! (ABC, 11:35 PM) 
🔔 The Late Show with Stephen Colbert (CBS, 11:35 PM) 
🔔 Nightline (ABC, 12:37 AM) 
🔔 The Late Late Show with James Corden (CBS, 12:37 AM) 

📺Broadcast/Cable/Satellite - RETRO BINGE📺

The Andy Griffith Show (Sundance, 6:00 AM - 1:00 PM); Law & Order (Pop, 6:00 AM - 8:00 PM); M*A*S*H* (TVLand, 7:00 AM - 11:00 AM); Roseanne (CMT, 9:00 AM - 12:00 PM); Parks and Recreation (Comedy Central, 9:00 AM - 2:00 PM); Living Single (TVOne, 9:00 AM - 12:00 PM); Hawaii Five-0 (Ion, 10:00 AM - 2:00 AM); Gunsmoke (TVLand, 12:00 PM - 4:00 PM); Seinfeld (Comedy Central, 2:00 - 6:00 PM); Family Ties (Antenna, 5:00 PM - 6:00 PM); One Day at a Time (Antenna, 6:00 PM - 7:00 PM); The Office (Comedy Central, 6:00 PM - 11:30 PM); Three's Company (Antenna, 7:00 PM - 8:00 PM); The Jeffersons (Antenna, 8:00 PM -9:00 PM); Everybody Loves Raymond (TV Land, 8:00 PM - 11:05 PM); Barney Miller (Antennae, 9:00 PM - 10:00 PM); King of Queens (TV Land, 11:05 PM - 2:00 AM); Designing Women (Antenna, 11:30 PM); Becker (Antenna, 12:00 AM - 1:00 AM); Wings (Antennae, 1:00 AM - 2:00 AM); Alice (Antenna, 2:00 AM - 3:00 AM); Benson (Antenna, 3:00 AM - 4:00 AM); Mom (TV Land,3:10 AM - 4:50 AM)

📺 Johnny Carson (Antenna, 10:00 PM) 'Comic Jack Benny; football player Joe Namath; actress Elke Sommer.'

Yuzuru Hanyu Ice Story 2023 “Gift” At Tokyo Dome 

Key Sources: The Futon Critic; Zap2it; Netflix; Wikipedia; Horrornews.net; Sysfy.com; hollywoodreporter.com

⭐: Top Pick
💲: Game show
🎥: Movie
📺: Throwback
✔️: Video/gif/photo included