Tonight’s top pick is Welcome to Flatch, which sports a doomed ABC sitcom from the Obama era title if ever I’ve heard one. Although points for being an Americanization of a British show, which I was just thinking needs to happen more often again.
Let’s see what else TV has to offer us for Thursday, March 17. All times are EST.
STREAMING
The Dropout, 12:01 a.m., Hulu. “Flower of Life.” “With the Walgreens deadline looming, Elizabeth and Sunny scramble to find solutions to their technological failures. Ian is drawn into Elizabeth’s lawsuit against Richard.”
The Problem with Jon Stewart, 12:01 a.m., Apple TV+. “Media.”
DMZ, 3:01 a.m., HBO Max. Limited series premiere. “Good Luck,” “Advent,” “The Good Name” and “Home.” “DMZ leaps off the pages of the acclaimed DC graphic novel into the visual landscape of a dangerous and distorted Manhattan as one woman navigates a demilitarized zone in a harrowing quest to find her lost son.” The pilot is directed by Executive Producer Ava DuVernay. All other episodes are directed by Ernest Dickerson. Roberto Patino wrote all four episodes. Starring Rosario Dawson, Benjamin Bratt, Rutina Wesley and Mamie Gummer.
Minx, 3:01 a.m., HBO Max. Series premiere. “Pilot” and “Au devoir, le double dong.” “Set in 1970s Los Angeles, (the show) centers around Joyce (Ophelia Lovibond), an earnest young feminist who joins forces with a low-rent publisher (Jake Johnson) to create the first erotic magazine for women.” The pilot is directed by Executive Producer Rachel Lee Goldenberg. Paul Feig is also among the executive producers. Two episodes available per week.
Rescued by Ruby, 3:01 a.m., Netflix. Premiere. “Chasing his dream to join an elite K-9 unit, a state trooper (Grant Gustin) partners with a fellow underdog: clever but naughty shelter pup Ruby. Based on a true story.”
Bel-Air, 3:01 a.m., Peacock. “No One Wins When the Family Feuds.” “As the Banks family celebrates Will’s birthday, his mom comes to visit, causing unexpected tension. The adults consider whether it’s time to tell Will about his father.”
Our Flag Means Death, 3:01 a.m., HBO Max. “This Is Happening” and “We Gull Way Back.”
Star Trek: Picard, 3:01 a.m., Paramount+. “Assimilation.” “Picard and the crew travel back to 2024 Los Angeles in search of the ‘Watcher,’ who can help them identify the point at which time diverged. Seven, Raffi and Rios venture out into an unfamiliar world 400 years in the past, while Picard and Jurati attempt to gather information from an unlikely, and dangerous, ally.”
Star Trek: Discovery, 3:01 a.m., Paramount+. Fourth season finale. “Coming Home.” “The DMA approaches Earth and Ni’Var. With evacuations underway, Burnham and the team aboard the U.S.S. Discovery must find a way to communicate and connect with a species far different from their own before time runs out.”
TALKIN’ ‘BOUT TALK
Good Morning America, 7 a.m., ABC. Daniel Radcliffe (The Lost City), a performance by Riverdance (their 25th anniversary tour) and Deals and Steals with Tory Johnson.
CBS Mornings, 7 a.m., CBS. Clark Kellogg, CBS Sports’ lead college basketball analyst.
Today, 7 a.m., NBC. Celebrating St. Patrick’s Day, a segment on McSorely’s Old Ale House in Manhattan, lifestyle contributor Jill Martin and TV personality Donal Skehan (Donal’s Road Trip). Later, author Andi Andrew (Fridenship; it’s complicated), “Women’s History Month products with Jill Martin,” life coach Ronnie Polaneczky and Donal Skehan returns for St. Patrick’s Day cooking. After that, Daniel Radcliffe, Jill Martin again (for shopping tips) and Dr. Elizabeth Lombardo explores how to find a work-life balance.
The View, 11 a.m., ABC. Guest co-host Alyssa Farah Griffin is joined by Patti LuPone (Company) and Josh Peck (Happy People Are Annoying).
The Talk is not on CBS today due to NCAA Basketball.
Syndicated Corner, times and stations vary:
The Rachael Ray Show. Malcolm-Jamal Warner (The Resident), Dr. Ian Smith with tips for flu season, celebrity nutritionist Kelly LeVeque on electrolyte water and Rachael’s Greek-style stuffed peppers.
Live with Kelly and Ryan. Andrew Garfield (Tick, Tick…Boom!), Nicole Kidman (Being the Ricardos) and St. Patrick’s Day crafts. This is apparently a new episode, but if you told me it was a compilation, I wouldn’t doubt you.
The Wendy Williams Show. Guest co-hosts Fat Joe and Remy Ma welcome Ja Rule (his Vibes tour).
The Kelly Clarkson Show. Seth Meyers (I’m Not Scared, You’re Scared) and the cast of CODA: Marlee Matlin, Troy Kotsur, Emilia Jones, Daniel Durant and Eugenio Derbez.
The Ellen DeGeneres Show. RERUN. Gwyneth Paltrow promotes goop products and her Netflix series, Sex, Love & goop.
The Drew Barrymore Show. Evan Rachel Wood (Phoenix Rising), a deserving viewer is honored for being a Drew-Gooder and Debbie Gibson (her The Body Remembers tour) joins Drew and Ross for Drew’s News.
Dr. Phil. “68-Pound Anorexic Nutrition Counselor.”
2022 NCAA BASKETBALL (all are LIVE first round matches)
For today’s edition, I’m including games before 5 p.m. EST.
Michigan vs. Colorado State, 12 p.m., CBS.
South Dakota State vs. Providence, 12:30 p.m., TRU.
Memphis vs. Boise State, 1:30 p.m., TNT.
Norfolk State vs. Baylor, 1:50 p.m., TBS.
Longwood vs. Tennessee, 2:30 p.m., CBS.
Richmond vs. Iowa, 3 p.m., TRU.
Georgia State vs. Gonzaga, 4 p.m., TNT.
Marquette vs. North Carolina, 4:20 p.m., TBS.
New Mexico State vs. Connecticut, 6:45 p.m., TNT.
Saint Peter’s vs. Kentucky, 7 p.m., CBS.
Mount St. Mary’s vs. Longwood, women’s match, 7 p.m., ESPN2.
Indiana vs. Saint Mary’s, 7:15 p.m., TBS.
Creighton vs. San Diego State, 7:15 p.m., TRU.
PRE-PRIMETIME MOVIES
Smoke, 6 p.m., The Movie Channel Xtreme.
The Parallax View, 6:30 p.m., Showtime Extreme.
Top Gun, 7 p.m., Paramount.
The Dead Zone, 7:16 p.m., MoreMax.
Pulp Fiction, 7:25 p.m., Showtime.
8 P.M.
MasterChef, FOX. 19th season premiere. “Junior Edition: Punch and Munch.” “The contestants must punch a hole through a wall of mystery ingredients and make a dish featuring the item in their respective squares.”
Station 19, ABC. “In My Tree.” “The Dean Miller Memorial Clinic has its opening day. Sullivan gives Beckett an ultimatum. The crew responds to a skydiving incident.”
Law & Order, NBC. “Fault Lines.” “After a family court judge is murdered, Bernard and Cosgrove dig into the many grievances against him. When the DA’s office is faced with unforeseen challenges, Maroun takes matters into her own hands to save the case.”
This Old House, PBS. “West Roxbury: Exploring Flooring.” “New granite stairs are installed on the front porch. A brick walkway. Installing a new back door. Installing a cable rail system on the back stairs. Visiting a trade school in Philadelphia.”
Top Chef, Bravo. “Noodles and Rice and Everything Nice.” “The chefs are surprised in the kitchen by Top Chef Miami winner Hung Huynh and challenged to make a dish inspired by five of the larger Asian communities in Houston. Along with Hung, the judges and Kiran Verma, they’ll be serving 100 guests.”
A Gift of Murder, Lifetime Movie Network. Premiere. “Forced to transfer to a new school, Dylan quickly rubs reigning mean girl Tiffany the wrong way. Dylan’s family offers to throw her a sweet 16 party to help her adjust, but Tiffany will stop at nothing to destroy Dylan’s plans — including murder.”
Movie Night!
Road House, BBC America.
Thelma & Louise, HBO Signature.
Leprechaun, Syfy.
The Music Man, TCM.
Big Night, The Movie Channel Xtreme.
9 P.M.
2022 NCAA Women’s Basketball Tournament, ESPN2. LIVE. Florida State vs. Missouri State.
2022 NCAA Basketball Tournament, 9:15 p.m., TNT. LIVE. Vermont vs. Arkansas.
2022 NCAA Basketball Tournament, 9:30 p.m., CBS. LIVE. San Francisco vs. Murray State.
2022 NCAA Basketball Tournament, 9:45 p.m., TBS. LIVE. Akron vs. UCLA.
2022 NCAA Basketball Tournament, 9:55 p.m., TRU. LIVE. Texas Southern vs. Kansas.
Call Me Kat, FOX. “Call Me the Bad Boy of Cheese.” “Kat tries to welcome a new business to the neighborhood, but the owner thinks he can get away with whatever he wants. Randi tries to figure out a great gift for Carter.”
Welcome to Flatch, FOX. Premiere. “Pilot.” “The whole town attends the annual Scarecrow Festival, where cousins and best friends Kelly and Shrub compete in the festival events.”
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, NBC. “Sorry If It Got Weird for You.” “The creator of a dating app is accused of using it to rape women. Velasco’s experience as an SVU detective is put on trial.”
Top Chef Family Style, Bravo. “No Pig Skins Allowed.” “The 11 duos participate in the Top Chef Family Style Tailgate Tournament and are taken with creating plant-based food for the 2021 L.A. Rams draft class and guest judges L.A. Rams linebacker Kenny Young and social media influencer Tabitha Brown.”
Grey’s Anatomy, ABC. “The Makings of You.” No description given, but apparently love is in the air.
Courtesy ABC/YouTubeMovie Night!
The Brothers Grimm, MoreMax.
Inglourious Basterds, Starz.
Point Break, 9:30 p.m., Paramount.
The Snowman, 9:32 p.m., Cinemax.
The Vow, 9:45 p.m., Sho2.
10 P.M.
Big Sky, 10:01 p.m., ABC. “A Good Boy.” “Determined to save Max and Rachel, Jenny reluctantly partners with T-lock. Scarlett prepares to do whatever it takes to keep her and Ronald safe. Sen and Jag form an unexpected alliance to uncover the truth.”
Law & Order: Organized Crime, NBC. “Guns & Roses.” “The task force investigates a connection between the Marcy Organization and the murder of a lawyer and her client. Stabler settles into a new assignment. Bell reminds Nova who she really works for.”
Grown-ish, Freeform. “Laugh Now Cry Later.” “Zoe and Aaron’s relationship is put to the test when she has to decide between a new job opportunity and following Aaron on his new career adventure. Nomi is accepted to the law school of her dreams but has to weigh the options.”
Single Drunk Female, Freeform. Season finale. “A Wedding.” “On her wedding day, Britt’s jitters lead her to make an unexpected decision. Carol and Bob take their relationship to a new level. Sam learns the truth about James and is shaken to the core about what her future might hold.”
Johnny Carson, Tim Conway and Harry Anderson are the guests on this March 17, 1987 episode.
Movie Night!
The Martian, FX.
Queenpins, Showcase.
Nowhere Boy, The Movie Channel Xtreme.
Ghost, 10:30 p.m., BBC America.
Oliver!, 10:45 p.m., TCM.
LATE NIGHT TALK!
Watch What Happens Live With Andy Cohen, 10 p.m., Bravo. Seth Meyers.
The Daily Show With Trevor Noah, 11 p.m., Comedy. Tiffanie Drayton (Black American Refugee: Escaping the Narcissism of the American Dream.)
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, 11:34 p.m., NBC. Billy Crystal, Emilia Jones and Normani.
Jimmy Kimmel Live!, 11:35 p.m., ABC. Charlie Puth.
The Late Show With Stephen Colbert, 12:35 a.m., CBS. RERUN. Daniel Craig and Doris Kearns Goodwin.
Nightline, 12:37 a.m., ABC.
Late Night With Seth Meyers, 12:37 a.m., NBC. Penelope Cruz, Hugh Dancy, Paul Feig and sitting in with the 8G Band, Larnell Lewis.
The Late Late Show With James Corden, 1:37 a.m., CBS. RERUN. Von Miller, Jenny Slate, Murray Bartlett and Teddy Swims.
LATE NIGHT PICK!
Smokey and the Bandit, 1 a.m., Showtime Extreme.
Sources: Futon Critic, zap2it, individual show websites.
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