Thoughts on The Wedding Singer

 

via Gfycat

"(to mirror) It's nice to meet you, I'm Mrs. Julia Gulia. *cries* ... Hi. I'm pleased to meet you. I'm Mrs. Robbie Hart. Robbie and I are so pleased you could come to our wedding. ..."

It's time once again for Thoughts On in the purest sense!

1. "Alright, everybody, come on! Out on the dance floor! Whoa-ho! Look at the happy couple! No exceptions! Up out of your chairs!" Eighteen seconds in and it's already time to party!

2. The Wedding Singer positioned Adam Sandler in a new direction. He had gotten the girl in Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore, but those movies' love stories were secondary. Singer lives or dies on whether or not we care that Robbie Hart (Adam) will get Julia Sullivan (Drew Barrymore).

3. I wonder how many audience members watched the performance of "You Spin Me Round (Like a Record)" and expected to get a movie that would do little more than make fun of the 1980s. There's plenty of chuckling about the past in Singer, but the better jokes work when there's more to it than the reference.

4. This opening number's a great example. We've got Robbie, George (Alexis Arquette) and the band selling the hell out of their song, yes. Not to mention the ostentatiously "1985" outfits designed by Mona May. But there's also the vignettes of universal wedding behavior. My favorites are the couple without rhythm getting down and those three men doing their shoulder dance in unison. The only improvement I would make is including a shot of Julia, either with or without Holly (Christine Taylor).

5. Here's proof that Sandler isn't vain. He let his star vehicle halt so Steve Buscemi could show up and get some of the movie's best laughs. Roger Ebert liked Steve better than Adam: "(Buscemi) has the timing, the presence and the intelligence to go right to the edge. Sandler, however, always keeps something in reserve -- his talent. It's like he's afraid of committing; he holds back so he can use the 'only kidding' defense." Janet Maslin also felt Adam "plays it semi-sincere." Whatever. Back in the movie, I liked Grandma Molly's shocked reaction to Dave insisting the newlyweds will get divorced in a year.

6. Okay, it's time to talk about George. Singer does laugh at him, with gags like his mascara running when he cries about Robbie being left at the altar, or having him wear the wedding dress Julia likes best. But there's also times where the joke isn't on George, like when drunk Dave (Buscemi) says that he likes "her." 

7. I'll just say that whomever came up with George's business, whether credited screenwriter Tim Herlihy, script doctors Carrie Fisher, Judd Apatow and Sandler, director Frank Coraci, or Arquette herself, went for the easy jokes. On a positive note, Arquette gave her all to "Do You Really Want to Hurt Me?" and Boy George was apparently cool with getting spoofed.

8. More than seven minutes in, and we're introduced to Julia through leering comments by Sammy (Allen Covert). "If she's half as easy as Holly, I'll close this deal by the end of the week." Not only that, but Julia gets her ass squeezed by an old guy and Holly's establishing character moment is the reveal that she showed her boobs to banquet hall cook Andre (Robert Smigel) for better treatment. Once was enough, writers.

9. I'd say Singer was the first movie where Drew Barrymore's comeback started paying off. Yes, she made an impact in Scream and also did Boys on the Side and Mad Love, but this showed she could score as a romantic comedy star, which was often the apex for young actresses in those days. If we didn't have goodwill toward Drew, then Julia wouldn't be remembered as anything other than a baby-faced moper who gets with a guy she's only known for a summer. ... And what a baby face it is! Drew was 22 during filming.

10. This time around, I'm noticing the attention given to Robbie's family situation is somewhat excessive. Kate (Jodi Thelen) and Robbie lost their parents when they were young, which she says caused him to want to start a family of his own. I'm only passingly familiar with the musical adaptation of Singer, which cut Kate, Andy (Frank Sivero) and their boys and made Rosie (here, Ellen Albertini Dow) Robbie's grandma.

11. "That's a good meatball" is one of those movie lines my dad and youngest brother loved saying over the years. One more note about families and The Wedding Singer: the musical also calls more attention to Julia's parents being divorced. I think that last time I saw Singer was before my parents divorced. This time around, I definitely heard the bitterness coming from Julia's mother (Christina Pickles).

12. "You got to get married before your hips start spreading and you get facial hair, which, by the way, comes from your father's mother. Looks like Magnum, P.I., for God's sake." "Well, I can't make Glenn set a date." "Well ... you're going to hate this idea, but I think you should consider ... a fake pregnancy." "I'm exiting the car." "Look, it's just a means to an end. Believe me, in five years, he'll thank you for it."

13. Nice performance by the arranger and artists of that string version of "Don't Stop Believing." Especially for the transition in and out of the warped sound as Robbie registers being jilted by Linda (Angela Featherstone).

14. "No, I don't need more time, Robbie. I don't ever want to marry you." "Jeez, you know, that information might have been a little more useful to me yesterday." "... I'm not in love with Robbie now. I'm in love with Robbie, six years ago. ... The point is, I woke up this morning and I realized I'm about to marry a wedding singer? I am never going to leave Ridgefield." *Robbie brings up the idea of him and Linda raising a family* "Oh, yeah, living in your sister's basement with five kids while you're off every weekend doing wedding gigs at a whopping $60 bucks a pop?" "Once again, things that could have been brought to my attention yesterday!"

15. Before appearing to leave for good, Linda accuses Robbie of caring more about being married than who he'd be married to. This idea is explored for the next hour with Julia and Glenn (Matthew Glave). The writers didn't bother to make him personally appealing. It's just a lot of condescending lines. "(A wedding's) more important to you anyway." Granted, this makes it easier for us to root for Robbie and Julia, but like I said, we've got an hour to go with this jerk-off.

16. I kinda hope Robbie made it up to Cindy & Scott, like playing for their anniversary or kid's graduation party. "... I have a microphone, and you don't, so you will listen to every damn word I have to say!" The setup, execution and aftermath of Robbie singing "Love Stinks" is great -- leg-biting guy from Table Nine for the win! -- although I question how it didn't get Robbie suspended, if not banned, from the banquet hall.

17. "Is it true that you're in the middle of a nervous breakdown?" "No." "Nervous breakdown! Nervous breakdown!" "Who said that?" "Everybody's been saying that." "Everybody? You're eight years old. You only know your parents. What are you talking about?" "Is it true that you're gonna end up in a mental institution?" "Cuckoo's nest! Cuckoo's nest!"

18. Julia and Glenn's engagement party took place some time after May 5, 1985, three months prior to their wedding. Let's say May 10, which was a Friday. The party also took place two weeks after Cindy & Scott's wedding (approximately Friday, April 26), which was five days after Robbie and Linda's failed ceremony (approximately Sunday, April 21). Which would mean that (news item?) about New Coke's failure that Andre listened to at the start of the movie was an anachronism. New Coke was introduced on April 23, 1985. Sorry, folks, not all of my thoughts are interesting. But I have a regular column, so you will read every damn word I have to type!

19. Robbie's climb from rock bottom includes playing a bar mitzvah, enlisting Julia to build the confidence of "the new lord of the ladies" (Jimmy Karz) and charming the hell out of everybody with "That's All." Having everyone, young or old, grab their dance partner's ass sorta encapsulates Singer's role of fusing Sandler's past and present niches in movie comedy. Also, as great as Adam and Drew are here, they're just beaten out by Smigel. Wisely, it's his last appearance in the movie. He's not the last scene-stealer, though.

20. "Chaka Khan! Thank you. This is Jimmy Moore saying, 'That ain't no sock in my crotch.' Okay, take four, everybody." Just like his appearances in Penny Marshall's movies, we have Jon Lovitz coming in, being funny and getting the hell out of there. Well, actually, he returns to deliver the punchline to Robbie's performance of "Somebody Kill Me." "He's losing his mind. *eyes open in realization* And I'm reaping all the benefits. *grin as curtain slowly closes in front of him*"

21. I could make fun of the blatant foreshadowing of Glenn's behavior on the flight to Vegas, but the truth is, I like most of these scenes at Singer's midpoint. I though the moment (on July 29) when it's apparent to Sammy that Robbie is in love with Julia is especially sweet. "She took (her jacket) off on Noxon Street. She said 'It's not jacket weather anymore.'" And then it's a little awkward how this is followed up by Robbie threatening to break Sammy's neck if he talks more about Julia's ass.

22. Robbie is rewarded for his chivalry by sharing in a "church tongue" kiss with Julia. You would think that Holly would suddenly realize how Robbie feels about Julia, but for whatever reason, she decides to go out with him. "Excuse me. Just because he's going out with me doesn't mean he's gonna get laid. *Glenn and Julia simultaneously give Holly a "Bitch, please!" look* All right, he probably will."

23. Holly and Robbie and Julia and Glenn's double date includes the followup to Julia saying she's not much of a drinker. Holly canoodling with Robbie causes Julia to wolf down her drink. This is, like, Screenwriting 101, but it's executed well. Once the guys are alone, Robbie learns Glenn's last name is Gulia and that he isn't, nor will be, faithful to Julia. That zoom in to Sandler at 59:00 as it's all clear to Robbie is another encapsulation of what I've been trying to say. Only a star would get a zoom in like that.

24. Holly finally gets a clue and has one of the movie's most interesting exchanges with Robbie. Money and security isn't important to some people. It's important to all people. This is followed up in Holly and Julia's last scene together, when Julia claims that security isn't a factor for why she's marrying Glenn. "Then why are you?"

25. It's now Thursday, three days until Julia and Glenn's wedding. For the record, Aug. 5, 1985 was actually a Monday, not a Sunday. Anyway, Robbie's giving up music. He fights with Julia, discovers she was going to give him personalized sheets to write his songs on and drowns his sorrows. It's the followup to Robbie mentioning that he's also not much of a drinker. And to think that Singer's script didn't get an Oscar nod. That's Tim Herlihy as Rudy the bartender, by the way.

26. Yet another opportunity for scene stealing happens, this time with Carmen Filpi as the old man in the bar. "(Women) rip your heart out of your ass. ... You need a prostitute." The ultimate being-a-playboy-really-sucks speech comes from John Candy in Splash, but Covert's not bad here. Easy punchline, though, with Filpi being the one to hold Sammy and tell him that everything is gonna be alright. Then again, maybe Sammy's plight needed to be played for laughs, since Singer has a genuinely emotional moment right after.

27. The look on Robbie's face when he misunderstands why Julia's so happy in her wedding dress ... It's closely followed by his getting teary eyed at witnessing Glenn and friends out with some bimbos. "You're ridiculous, man. Stop all this cheating shit, moron. She's a good girl." How the hell much more genuine did Ebert and Maslin want Adam to be?

28. Interesting switch on romantic comedy tropes. Robbie's been "the good boy" so far. He didn't have sex with Holly. The last woman he had sex with was his then wife-to-be, Linda. Adam and Drew have made movies together since Singer, but I hope they never feel the need to do something like Coming 2 America, with it turning out that Linda did conceive a child with Robbie while he was unconscious. Robbie's kiss off to Linda -- "Now please get out of my Van Halen t-shirt before you jinx the band and they break up." -- is a line I remember appearing when Singer was being promoted on TV in 1998.

29. Rosie's a hit at her golden anniversary, Robbie goes to win back Julia and we get one last candidate for Best Scene Stealer. No, it's not the Flock of Seagulls fan that gets Robbie on a flight to Vegas. Or Maree Cheatham as the sweet older lady in first class. It's Billy Idol as himself. "Ah, Glenn doesn't deserve her. All her cares about are possessions. Fancy cars, CD players. Even women are possessions to him." "See? Billy Idol gets it. I don't know why she doesn't get it." Adam gets one more zoom in for importance at 88:00, when Robbie realizes he's on the same plane as Julia and Glenn. "(first class, in unison) No way!"

30. Okay, so Singer's script wasn't Oscar-worthy. You can't tell me that "Grow Old With You" couldn't have made it into into the Best Original Song category. Alas ... Julia/Drew's reaction to the song still chokes me up a little. Okay, a lot. "So let me clear the dishes in our kitchen sink/put you to bed when you've had too much to drink/Oh, I could be the man who grows old with you/I wanna grow old with you."

31. Researching Singer, I discovered some valid criticism. The website Industrial Scripts said Julia changed by choosing love over money, but claims Robbie didn't really change. They've got a point. Maybe if Linda had appeared in more of the movie and we got to see Robbie go from feigning love with her to genuinely being in love with Julia. As for Robbie finally making it in music thanks to Billy Idol's endorsement and the strength of one song, I guess we're supposed to feel that it's his reward for being a romantic comedy hero.

Recommended with reservations.

Thoughts:

-- "All right, remember: alcohol equals puke equals smelly mess equals nobody likes you."

-- Box Office: Grossing $80.2 million on an $18 million budget, this opened at No. 2. Unlike most movies that came in behind Titanic, this had staying power. The Titanic-Singer pair topped the box office for three weekends and Singer ranks No. 24 for 1998's releases.

-- Critic's Corner: "Half the film is an ingenuous love story, but the better half consists of pop culture time warp jokes set in 1985," Maslin wrote before she slightly contradicted herself. "The film itself never gets past a sketch mentality, with frequent cameo turns and costume gags throughout." "It's exhausting, seeing the characters work so hard at avoiding the obvious," Ebert sniffed. Kevin Thomas, Los Angeles Times, was more favorable: "... you (belatedly) realize how much skill, caring and good judgement had to have gone into its making." Owen Gleiberman, Entertainment Weekly: "It has the good fortune to be one of the first of what will probably turn into a deluge of glibly packaged '80s nostalgia flicks."

-- Critic's Corner, Adam: "(Sandler) is not a lead. He is the best friend, or the creep, or the loser boyfriend. He doesn't have the voice to play a lead. Even at his most sincere, he sounds like he's doing stand up," Ebert claimed. Thomas: "Sandler emerges as a surprisingly appealing romantic lead." Leonard Klady, Variety: "You believe him as a romantic character and, even more important, that someone else would find him attractive. It is, quite simply, a breakthrough performance." "Welcome to the new Adam Sandler: the comedian as Nice Jewish Boy," Gleiberman wrote.

-- Critic's Corner, Drew: She actually didn't get singled out much. Ebert felt Drew was capable of being a leading lady, but questioned why she would make a movie with plot mechanics that were hoary even in John Barrymore's prime. Klady: "Barrymore covers new ground as a light comic actress, making the most of an opportunity to play a vulnerable and appealing character."

-- Awards Watch: Adam and Drew were each nominated for the American Comedy Award, losing to Roberto Benigni and Cameron Diaz, respectively. Adam won the Blockbuster Entertainment Award for Best Comedy Actor for this and The Waterboy, while Drew again lost to Cameron Diaz. Adam and Drew both won Kids Choice Awards, him for this and The Waterboy and her for this and Ever After: A Cinderella Story, according to IMDB. Finally, Adam and Drew's kiss won an MTV Movie Award for 1997-98 (over Titanic, Good Will Hunting and the same sex kisses in Chasing Amy and In & Out), while he was nominated for Best Comedic Performance (losing to Jim Carrey in Liar Liar) and Adam and Drew were nominated for Best Onscreen Duo (losing to John Travolta and Nicolas Cage in Face/Off).

-- "Are you nervous? ... Oh, not about the wedding -- about the wedding night. Will this be your first time with intercourse? ... Well, no -- don't be ashamed. You know, when I got married, I wasn't a virgin. I already had intercourse with eight men. ... That was a lot back then. That would be like 200 today."

-- Musical Moments: The score is 6-5, still favoring songs not written for the movies they were in. I realized today that I forgot to count the music in Spice World, so I'm belatedly giving points to "Too Much" and "Spice Up Your Life." Singer gets points for "You Spin Me Round (Like a Record)," "Love Stinks," "That's All," "Rapper's Delight" and for non-covers, "Somebody Kill Me" and "Grow Old With You."

-- Hey, It's ...!: Peter Dante, Mark Lonow, Angela Paton, Kevin Nealon and Shanna Moakler. Plus Brian Posehn and Michael Shuman. I also think I hear Mr. Lawrence (SpongeBob SquarePants, Rocko's Modern Life) screaming "YOU SUCK!" when George won't stop singing "Do You Really Want to Hurt Me." 

-- The choreography was by the late Smith Wordes, who was in Disney's The One and Only, Genuine, Original Family Band, danced in Captain EO and the "Smooth Criminal" video, also choreographed the "Express Yourself" video (assistant choreographed, but still) and Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion and will contribute to one more movie in 1998 ... Star Trek: Insurrection.

-- Fan Disservice Junction: Glenn wearing leopard print bikini underwear.

-- "... Well, you can just look at a couple, and you can tell right away that they're gonna stay together forever. Like, uh, Donald and Ivana ... and Woody and Mia ... and Burt and Loni."

-- Next: U.S. Marshals. On deck: Hush.