What's On Tonight (Friday): Cry Macho and Let Squint the Clints of Eastwood...

 

Cry Macho

In the past I have been hesitant to make an HBO Max film the Top Pick.  My reasoning is that these films are getting released in theaters too so they're not truly a "TV thing."  Unfortunately for Warner Bros. most people do seem to think of these movies as a "TV thing" - at least judging by their box office.  Since I have never been one to fight back against the will of the masses I too have decided these films are of and for TV and therefore should get the same shot at Top Pick as everything else.  Besides, who knows how much longer we're going to have Clint Eastwood around and I'd like to honor him before he dies mid-squint.  

Elsewhere we have got a boat load of premieres this week.  Amazon has decided to release three documentaries that show that the UK has always been just as racist as the US.  They've also got a musical (a lot of those getting made these days), a feminist period piece and a show for pre-schoolers centered around a robot boy because why the fuck not?

Apple has the second season of The Morning Show and it's own preschool show, neither of which anyone will watch because no one has Apple TV (statistically speaking, that is).  Netflix has an animated show for adults (because fuck those pre-schooler bastards) and a new Korean thriller series called Squid Game.  Is it messed up?  Well, it's Korean, so I'd say the chances are good.

Even broadcast and cable networks have new stuff to sample tonight but the only thing that truly matters is the Lifetime Movie Network is premiering a new film called My Husband's Secret Brother.  The title alone is awesome enough to land a massive audience, but this film has ace in the hole, or should I say, three aces.  That's right!  For the first time ever (maybe, I'm not looking that up) ALL THREE LAWRENCE BROTHERS WILL APPEAR IN THE SAME MOVIE.  JOEY.  MATTHEW.  THE OTHER ONE.  If the ad is to be believed, JOEY murders THE OTHER ONE to get with THE OTHER ONE'S wife.  And MATTHEW is in it too for some reason (probably to hold on to his union health insurance).  Whatever the reason it's going to be FUCKING AWESOME.

MAXIMUM FUCKING LAWRENCE.

TOP PICK

⭐ 🎥 Cry Macho✔️(HBO Max, 3:01 AM) 'The film stars Eastwood as Mike Milo, a one-time rodeo star and washed-up horse breeder who, in 1979, takes a job from an ex-boss to bring the man’s young son home from Mexico. Forced to take the backroads on their way to Texas, the unlikely pair faces an unexpectedly challenging journey, during which the world-weary horseman finds unexpected connections and his own sense of redemption.'

PREMIERES

🔔 Black Power: A British Story of Resistance (Amazon Prime, 12:01 AM) SPECIAL PRESENTATION.  'Narrated by Daniel Kaluuya, Black Power: A British Story Of Resistance looks at the 60s and 70s through the eyes of the young Black people who refused to take racism as a part of the natural order of things in the UK. It shows how the civil rights struggle in America inspired activists to take a stand, and features rare archive of Martin Luther King Jr., Malcolm X and Stokely Carmichael’s activities in Britain, as well as footage of leading figures in the movement in the UK: Altheia Jones-LeCointe, Darcus Howe and Roy Sawh.'

🔔 Subnormal: A British Scandal (Amazon Prime, 12:01 AM) SPECIAL PRESENTATION.  'Examining one of the biggest scandals in the history of British education, Subnormal: A British Scandal reveals how Black children in the 1960s & 70s were disproportionately sent to schools for the so-called “Educationally Subnormal” (ESN). This gripping documentary tells the story of how Black parents, teachers and activists banded together to expose the injustice and force the education system to change.  It explores the controversial debates on race and intelligence that led to the scandal, and the devastating impact it had on the children affected. The film discusses the IQ testing that took place and shows why it was heavily biased against Black migrant children.'

🎵 Everybody's Talking About Jamie (Amazon Prime, 12:01 AM) SPECIAL PRESENTATION.  'Inspired by true events, Everybody's Talking About Jamie is the film adaptation of the award-winning hit musical from London’s West End, about Jamie New (newcomer Max Harwood), a teenager in a blue collar English town with a dream of life on stage. While his classmates plan their livelihoods after graduation, Jamie contemplates revealing his secret career ambition as a fabulous and proud drag queen. His best friend Pritti (Lauren Patel) and his loving mom (Sarah Lancashire) shower him with endless support while local drag legend Miss Loco Chanelle (Richard E. Grant) mentors him toward his debut stage performance. But it’s not all rainbows for Jamie as his deadbeat dad (Ralph Ineson), an uninspired career advisor (Sharon Horgan), and some ignorant school kids attempt to rain on his sensational aspirations. In rousing and colorful musical numbers, Jamie and his community inspire one another to be more accepting, and to see the value in facing adversity stepping out of the darkness into the spotlight.'

🎥 The Mad Women's Ball (Amazon Prime, 12:01 AM) 'The Mad Women's Ball (Le Bal des Folles) tells the story of a young, radiant and passionate woman, Eugénie, living during the close of the 19th century. As a young woman, Eugénie discovers that she has the special power to hear the dead. After her family discovers her secret, she is taken to La Pitié Salpétrière Hospital without any way of escaping her fate. The hospital is a neurology clinic in Paris run by the famous professor and pioneer of neurology Dr. Charcot, where women diagnosed with hysteria, “craziness”, egomania, epilepsy and other types of mental or physical diseases are committed.  Her destiny becomes entwined with that of Geneviève, a nurse at the hospital whose life is passing her by. Their encounter will change both their futures as they will prepare for the annual “Bal des folles” organized by Dr. Charcot at the hospital.'

🎵 Do, Re & Mi (Amazon Prime, 12:01 AM) SERIES PREMIERE.  'An original animated series for preschoolers that centers on the musical adventures of three best birdie buddies voiced by Kristen Bell, Jackie Tohn, and Luke Youngblood. Featuring delightful adventures and toe-tapping original songs spanning multiple genres, the series takes little ones on a journey where they will discover new sounds and melodies, move to the beat, and see how music helps solve every problem!'

🔔 Uprising✔️ (Amazon Prime, 12:01 AM) LIMITED SERIES.  'Directed by Steve McQueen and James Rogan, Uprising is a vivid and visceral three-part documentary series (comprised of three hour-long episodes) examining three events from 1981 in the UK: The New Cross Fire that killed 13 Black youths, the Black People's Day of Action, which saw more than 20,000 people join the first organized mass protest by Black British people, and the Brixton riots. Uprising will reveal how these three events are intertwined, and how, in the process, race relations were defined for a generation.'

Uprising

🤖 Doug Unplugs✔️(Apple TV+, 12:01 AM) SECOND SEASON PREMIERE.  'Doug is a young robot who senses there’s more to life than just the facts. While other robots plug in for their daily download, Doug unplugs and journeys into the human world with his best friend Emma to experience its wonders firsthand.'

🌞 The Morning Show✔️(Apple TV+, 12:01 AM) SECOND SEASON PREMIERE.  'Season 2 finds "The Morning Show" team emerging from the wreckage of Alex and Bradley's actions, to a new UBA and a world in flux, where identity is everything and the chasm between who we present as and who we really are comes into play.'

🔔 Chicago Party Aunt✔️(Netflix, 3:01 AM) SERIES PREMIERE.  'Diane is an idolized troublemaker with a talent for avoiding adulthood — and a soft spot for her soul-searching nephew.'

🎥 Ankahi Kahaniya (Netflix, 3:01 AM) 'As big city life buzzes around them, lonely souls discover surprising sources of connection and companionship in three tales of love, loss and longing.  Starring Abhishek Banerjee, Rinku Rajguru and Delzad Hiwale.'

🎥 The Father Who Moves Mountains (Netflix, 3:01 AM) 'When his son goes missing during a snowy hike in the mountains, a retired intelligence officer will stop at nothing — and risk everything — to find him.  Starring Adrian Titieni, Elena Purea and Judith State.'

🎥 The Stronghold (Netflix, 3:01 AM) 'Tired of the small-time grind, three Marseille cops get a chance to bust a major drug network. But lines blur when a key informant makes a big ask.  Starring Gilles Lellouche, Karim Leklou and François Civil.'

🍆 Sex Education (Netflix, 3:01 AM) SEASON 3.  'While Otis and his classmates experience changes in their school and personal life, Jean must prepare for a new baby.  Season 3 will introduce Moordale Secondary School’s new Headteacher, Hope Haddon, who is replacing Michael Groff following his forced exit. Hope wants to reclaim Moordale’s reputation after it’s labeled the “sex school.”'

🦑 Squid Game✔️(Netflix, 3:01 AM) SEASON 1.  'Hundreds of cash-strapped players accept a strange invitation to compete in children's games. Inside, a tempting prize awaits — with deadly high stakes.'

Squid Game

🔔 Congressional Black Caucus Foundation National Town Hall (BET, 7:00 PM) SPECIAL PRESENTATION.  'Renowned thought leaders discuss the importance of creating a Black agenda, honoring Black voices in a democracy, and addressing the most pressing issues for the Black community today.

🔔 Phoenix Awards (BET, 8:00 PM) SPECIAL PRESENTATION. 'Recognizing individuals who have made significant contributions to society.'

💀 My Husband's Secret Brother✔️(LMN, 8:00 PM) 'A widowed heiress and her daughter find themselves in grave danger when secrets about her late husband's family and new boyfriend come to light.'

🔔 Soul of a Nation Presents: Corazon de America - Celebrating Hispanic Culture (ABC, 8:00 PM)  SPECIAL PRESENTATION. 'Celebrating the stories and the culture of the Hispanic community while keeping the importance of identity and pride at the forefront of the conversation.'

🔔 The Casagrandes (Nickelodeon, 8:00 PM) THIRD SEASON PREMIERE.  "Bend It Like Abuelo; Bunstoppable" - 'Hector finally joins his dream soccer team as their good luck charm; while preparing bao for the Chinese Cultural Fair, Sid and Adelaide face off against time-hopping bandits.'

🔔 Tooned In (Nickelodeon, 8:30 PM) SECOND SEASON PREMIERE.  'A cartoon trivia showdown that puts contestants to the test by proving their animation knowledge; hosted by an animated A.I. supercomputer, three kids compete in rounds of trivia for a chance to be declared the big winner.'

🔔 Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team (CMT, 9:00 PM) 16TH SEASON PREMIERE.  "Judge's Showcase" - 'The team's largest and most talented training camp class must impress DCC judges with solos and field dances to stay in the running.'

👽 The Proof is Out There (History, 10:00 PM) SECOND SEASON PREMIERE. "UFOs Caught on Camera" - 'Host Tony Harris separates the real from the fake in some of the top UFOs caught on camera in recent history.'

🔔 Tha God's Honest Truth With Lenard "Charlamagne" McKelvey (Comedy Central, 10:00 PM) SERIES PREMIERE.  "Decrackerfication" - 'Charlamagne Tha God considers what it will take to finally cleanse America of its racist past for the sake of its future.'

 

Chicago Party Aunt

STREAMING

🎵 The Masked Singer (Japan) TBA

🔔 Mr. Corman (Apple TV+, 12:01 AM) "Hope You Feel Better"

👀 See (Apple TV+, 12:01 AM) "The Witchfinder"

⚽ Ted Lasso (Apple TV+, 12:01 AM) "Beard After Hours"

🔔 Truth Be Told (Apple TV+, 12:01 AM) "If I Didn't Laugh, You'd Cry"

🍴 Family Dinner (Discovery+, 3:01 AM) "The Petrillo Family"

🔔 For the Love of Kitchens (Discovery+, 3:01 AM) "A Chef's Kitchen"

🔔 Home Work (Discovery+, 3:01 AM) "Art Deco Guest Suite"

🔔 Making Modern with Brooke and Brice (Discovery+, 3:01 AM) "From Empty Home to Oasis"

🔔 Point of View: A Designer Profile (Discovery+, 3:01 AM) "Kate Marker"

🔔 Restoration Road with Clint Harp (Discovery+, 3:01 AM) "Washington Inn"

🔔 Sparkshorts (Disney+, 3:01 AM) "Nona"

SPORTS TONIGHT*

🏌️‍♂️ PGA Tour Golf: Fortinet Championship, Second Round (Golf, 6:00 PM)

🏀 WNBA Basketball: Minnesota Lynx at Indiana Fever (CBSSN, 7:00 PM)

🏈 High School Football: American Heritage (Fla.) at Edna Karr (La.) (ESPN2, 7:00 PM)

🏈 College Football: UCF at Louisville (ESPN, 7:30 PM)

🏁 NASCAR Xfinity Racing Series: Food City 300 (NBCSN 7:30 PM)

🏌️‍♂️ PGA Tour Champions Golf: Sanford International, First Round (Golf, 9:30 PM)

🏈 CFL Football: Toronto Argonauts at Saskatchewan Roughriders (ESPNews, 9:45 PM)

🏋️‍♀️ Weightlifting: World's Ultimate Strongman & Woman (ESPN2, 10:00 PM)

🏈 High School Football: Bishop Gorman (NV) vs. Hamilton (AZ) (ESPNU, 10:00 PM)

*Sporting Events Are Subject To COVID-Related Postponements.

Everybody's Talking About Jamie

EARLY PRIMETIME

💲 America Says (GSN, 7:00 PM) "The Olivers vs. Lunch Ladies"

🔔 Kamp Koral: SpongeBob's Under Years (Nickelodeon, 7:00 PM) "Quest for Tire; A Cabin of Curiosities" - 'The weekly food delivery truck goes missing, so the campers must hunt it down like their primal ancestors; a mysterious cabin of odd campers have frightful fun with SpongeBob and Patrick after dark.'

🔔 The Smurfs (Nickelodeon, 7:30 PM) "Unsmurfable Smile; Mind the Cat" - 'Smurfette and Blossom try to make Grouchy smile by taking him on a camping trip; Gargamel falls under the mind control of Azrael and the Smurfs must help to set him free.'

🕗 8:00 EASTERN / 🕖 7:00 CENTRAL

👀 Big Brother (CBS, 8:00 PM) TBA

🔔 Burden of Truth (CW, 8:00 PM) SEASON FINALE.  "Standing by Peaceful Waters" - 'Joanna begins to chart a new path for the future; Billy gets some unexpected help in his pursuit of a new client; Dee's legal case is at a dead end; Luna is unsure where to turn.

🤼‍♂️ WWE's Friday Night Smackdown (Fox, 8:00 PM) 

👮‍♂️ The First 48: Catching a Killer (A&E, 8:00 PM) "Dangerous Business" - 'Enhanced: includes bonus footage; when a suburban teenager is found dead in a robbery gone bad, Minneapolis Detective Emily Dunphy must find out which of the victim's friends may have double-crossed him.'

🐟 River Monsters: Deadliest Man-Eaters (Animal Planet, 8:00 PM) "Fishermen Death Wish" 

💰 Gold Rush (Discovery, 8:00 PM) TBA

💧 Drain the Oceans (NGC, 8:00 PM) "Pirate Coasts" - 'Exciting new discoveries unearth the real story behind world famous pirates.'

💀 Killer Siblings: Williams/Bevers (Oxygen, 8:00 PM)

Doug Unplugs

🕗 9:00 EASTERN / 🕖 8:00 CENTRAL

🎭 Great Performances (PBS, 9:00 PM) "The Red Shoes" - 'Director-choreographer Matthew Bourne presents a stage adaptation of Hans Christian Andersen's \"The Red Shoes,\" featuring Ashley Shaw, Adam Cooper, Dominic North and Michela Meazza.'

💀 20/20 (ABC, 9:00 PM) "The Stanford Murders" - 'DNA evidence links two former Stanford University employees to the 1973 murders of Arlis Perry, Leslie Perlov and Janet Ann Taylor; featuring an interview with the family of one of the convicted killers.'

🔔 The Greatest #AtHome Videos (CBS, 9:00 PM) 'Special guest J.B. Smoove.'

🔔 Dynasty (CW, 9:00 PM) "Everything Looks Wonderful, Joseph" - 'Someone from Dominique's past returns; Blake takes Amanda under his wing, but she has other ideas; Sam and Culhane divulge a secret to the Carringtons; Fallon takes an unexpected journey.'

👮‍♂️ Cold Case Files (A&E, 8:00 PM) "The Heartland Killer" - 'In the 1980s, a suspected serial killer preyed on women in small towns located on the banks of the Mississippi River until the murders abruptly ceased and went unsolved.'

🍴 Diners, Drive-Ins And Dives (Food Network, 9:00 PM) "Domestic & Abroad" - 'Guy Fieri's digging into all-American and foreign favorites; in Houston, a funky spot is firing up Filipino flavor with a twist; a real-deal Washington meat market is stacking up serious sandwiches.'

👽 Ancient Aliens (History, 9:00 PM) "The Mystery of Mount Shasta" - 'Examining the unique geology and location of Mount Shasta in northern California, to determine why it is known as a hotbed of strange events, from Big Foot sightings to UFO encounters to hikers vanishing without a trace.'

🔍 Lost Citied with Albert Lin (NGC, 10:00 PM) "Megacity of the Maya Warrior King" - 'Albert Lin sets out to solve an ancient mystery and find a lost Maya city.'

👻 These Woods are Haunted (Travel, 9:00 PM) "There is Something Out There and Not a Human Being" - 'Shapeshifting shadow creatures terrorize the residents of a mobile home park in Texas; an aggressive Sasquatch ambushes a Missouri farmhouse.'

💖 Love After Lockup (WE, 9:00 PM) "Life After Lockup: Players Get Played" - 'Lisa catches Stan in a lie; Lacey makes a dangerous call; Brittany's confession stuns Marcelino; Nicolle hatches a plan to lure Daonte back; Ray breaks down over his shocking restitution; Kristianna reaches out to her estranged son.'

🕗 10:00 EASTERN / 🕖 9:00 CENTRAL

💀 Dateline NBC (NBC, 10:00 PM) "What Happened to Amy?" - 'Ohio investigators search for answers in the decades-old murder of 10-year-old Amy Mihaljevic; a retracing of Amy's steps from the day of the kidnapping.'

🔔 The New York Times Presents (FX, 10:00 PM) "Move Fast & Vape Things" - 'Two Stanford graduate students had an inspired idea and an idealistic mission: create an e-cigarette that would help millions of people stop smoking.'

🔔 Real Time with Bill Maher (HBO, 10:00 PM) TBA

👻 Surreal Estate (Syfy, 10:00 PM) SEASON FINALE. "The House Always Wins" - 'The Donovan House confronts Luke and the team with its deepest losses and greatest regrets.'

🤼‍♂️ All Elite Wrestling: Rampage (TNT, 10:00 PM) 

👻 The Alaska Triangle (Travel, 9:00 PM) "Gold Rush Ghost Town and Little Demons" - 'A ghost hunter seeks out spirits from the gold rush in Skagway, Alaska; tiny demonic creatures may be behind thousands of strange disappearances in the Alaska Triangle.'

👮‍♂️ American Justice (A&E, 10:01 PM) "Death By Text" - 'When 18-year-old Conrad Roy is found asphyxiated in his pickup truck, his death is quickly ruled a suicide; as detectives retrace Conrad's final moments, texts left on his cell phone reveal a toxic romance between him and Michelle Carter.'

The Morning Show

LATE NIGHT

🔔 The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon (NBC, 11:34 PM) 'Actress Jennifer Aniston; actress Amandla Stenberg; a special performance from the musical "Wicked."'

🔔 Jimmy Kimmel Live! (ABC, 11:35 PM) TBA

🔔 The Late Show With Stephen Colbert (CBS, 11:35 PM) TBA

🔔 Nightline (ABC, 12:37 AM) TBA

🔔 The Late Late Show With James Corden (CBS, 12:37 PM) 'Actor Hugh Grant; actor Mike Colter; Tomorrow X Together performs.'

🔔 Late Night With Seth Meyers (NBC, 12:37 PM) 'Comic John Mulaney; actress Regina Hall.'

Broadcast/Cable/Satellite - RETRO Binge

📺 The Andy Griffith Show (Sundance, 5:45 AM - 1:00 PM); ER (Pop, 6:00 AM - 1:00 PM); The Golden Girls (Hallmark, 8:00 AM - 11:00 AM); The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (VH1, 8:00 AM - 1:00 PM); Roseanne (CMT, 9:00 AM - 1:00 PM); M*A*S*H* (TVLand, 9:00 AM - 11:00 AM); Living Single (TVONE, 9:00 AM - 11:00 AM); Friends (TBS 10:00 AM - 4:00 PM); Hawaii Five-0 (Ion, 10:00 AM - 2:00 AM); Gunsmoke (TVLand, 12:00 PM - 4:00 PM); House (Pop, 1:00 PM - 8:00 PM); King of Queens (CMT, 1:00 PM - 4:00 PM); Law and Order (Sundance, 1:00 PM - 2:00 AM); Bones (TNT, 3:00 PM - 5:00 PM); Barney Miller (Antenna, 8:00 & 8:30 PM); Mom (CMT, 8:00 PM - 1:00 AM); Everybody Loves Raymond (TV Land, 8:00 PM - 11:05 PM); The Jeffersons (Antenna, 9:00 & 9:30 PM); Coach (Antenna, 11:30 PM) 

📺 Johnny Carson (Antenna, 10:00 PM) 'Comic Don Rickles; actor Eli Wallach; author Colleen McCullough; Lou Brock.'

More TV Listings: The Futon Critic; Zap2it

Key Sources: The Futon Critic; Zap2it; Netflix; Wikipedia; Horrornews.net; Sysfy.com; hollywoodreporter.com
⭐: Top Pick
💲: Game show
🎥: Movie
📺: Throwback
✔️: Video/gif/photo included