Welcome To Parasites And Other Wednesday Headlines

Via Imgur

'Billy Graham's Biggest Mistake Just Grateful Trump Ended Death Penalty For Saying Merry Christmas!' [Wonkette]

A Non-Exhaustive List Of The Various Chucklefucks Sullied, Stained, Ruined Or Otherwise In The Shitter Due To Their Willingness To Associate With Donald J. Trump [The Bulwark]

A Look At The Legacy And Future Of The Americans With Disabilities Act, Which Turned Thirty Years Old This Year [Under The Radar]

Steve Schmidt Has Officially Become A Democrat [The Hill]

Via Tenor

'Black Santa Is Back. Here's Why He Matters So Much' (Additional Video Here) [WGBH/YouTube]

🚨🚨 LYONA ALERT!!! 🚨🚨: Zouks! [The Daily Beast]

The Guy Who Defended Joe Paterno Also Makes Excuses For Dudes Jerking Off In Front Of Coworkers? Shocking! [Slate]

Comedy In The Era Of Trump [The Ringer]

Via Tumblr

No, Tom Everett Scott, Stay Away From Comic Book Movies! [Page Six]

Kelly Clarkson Will Grace Daytime TV For At Least Three More Years [The Hollywood Reporter]

Heidi Klum's Daughter Made Her Modeling Debut [Go Fug Yourself]

'Operation Baghdad Pups Helps Serviceman And Dog Reunite In The U.S.' [TODAY Via MSN]

Via Imgur

I'll Take SpongeBob And Slime Over Steve Kornacki [Awful Announcing]

Sage Steele Was Booted Off The Six P.M. Edition Of SportsCenter [Deadspin]

Don't Bother With Your Spring Training Countdown Calendar [Yahoo! Sports]

NFL MVP Watch [Fox Sports]

Via Gifer

Notable Television Premieres On This Day
Dragnet [1951]

Night Gallery [1970]

One Day At A Time [1975]

Today's Anti-Trumpidote - BELLE