Monday, February 10, 2020

What's On Tonight (Tuesday): The Conners Goes Live & After A Million Ads "For Life" Finally Arrives

Both Top Picks airing tonight on ABC--and ironically during the Oscars ceremony we saw a million ads for both shows and yet seemingly nothing for the 3 shows airing in-between them! (Does ABC even care about "Bless This Mess" anymore??? It'd be nice if they did now that i finally gotten into it!) Anyways this is What's On for February 11th 2020. (what's on apart from endless commercials for Mike Bloomberg of course...)





8:00

NCIS (CBS): The lead suspect in a murder case the team is solving is a woman that Gibbs' friend met on a dating site; Sloane has a secret admirer on Valentine's Day. (Gibbs literally only has two friends outside of work, Agent Fornell and that guy played by Don Lake who randomly showed up a couple seasons back--so since I can't see Fornell going on a dating site, I'm gonna guess that goofball and unlikely friend of Gibbs--Don Lake is back tonight.)

Ellen's Game of Games (NBC): "Girls Just Wanna Have Pudding" (Are you sure this wasn't already a Weird Al parody version??? I'm already envisioning the video to that!)

The Resident (FOX): Rerun from last month where Conrad tries to figure out his next move after being fired by the evil new management over at the hospital he's worked at for the past three years.

The Conners (ABC): This much hyped "Live" episode airs tonight which finds the family sharing their different takes on why they think everyone should vote; Meanwhile Louise (Katey Sagal) gets an opportunity that might take her away from Dan and Lanford which prompts the family to sound off on Dan's burgeoning relationship with her (which has been slow but steady thus far)  (I don't know why ABC is doing this quite honestly, but i mean both John Goodman and Laurie Metcalfe are veteran stage actors so I mean they both know what they're doing at least)

The Flash (The CW): Barry and Iris plan a romantic dinner for Valentine's Day but their evening is interrupted by an old foe; Killer Frost gets into the holiday spirit and attempts to help Allegra reconnect with an old love. (The episode is titled "Love Is A Battlefield") (Also Colbert a couple nights back had a joke about how Bloomberg is doubling his investment in the air time he'd already bought for his ads, and that the only possible way for him to double down on his ad spending would be to digitially insert himself into other ads or shows---so when i read this synopsis my initial thought was---Maybe Mike Bloomberg will show up as The Flash's old foe which would make no sense but I'd at least think it was funny--at least until he turns to the camera and starts talking about "As mayor of NYC....")

 Finding Your Roots (PBS): Questlove, S. Epertha Merkerson, and Ava Duverney explore where and how their ancestors were scattered by the slave trade. (Happy Black History Month PBS Viewers!!!!)

My Secret Valentine (Hallmark): Your Hallmark Channel Movie of the Night is this one where "A young woman takes advice from the chalkboard notes that a mysterious tenant leaves when a slick sales rep arrives with plans to by her family winery" (Oh That Old Plotline!) Starring Lacey Chabert (of course it does!), Andrew Walker, and Peter MacNeal '

8:30

Bless This Mess (ABC): Rip is excited to plan the perfect farm wedding for her best friend Sierra (played by Nicole Ritchie) but Sierra shows a different side of herself when she arrives in Bucksnort which could affect the wedding; Constance tries to keeps her mind off of Rudy after their break-up. (Look the sexual tension between Pam Grier and Ed Begley Jr. is palpable so clearly you cannot keep these two apart for very wrong show--it would just be cruel to your viewers!) (Bazinga?)

9:00

FBI (CBS): After a truck filled with armor piercing rifles is hijacked, the team works to discover who stole it, and what they have planned for them; a friend from OA's past returns to help with the case, but OA isn't so sure that he can trust him for some reason.  (It would be funny if again Michael Bloomberg showed up as OA's former friend.  "You know OA--as former mayor of NYC...")  ("Damnit Mayor Bloomberg, I'm trying to track down these stolen rifles, now is not the time for this!" "Well that's where you're wrong OA because as former mayor...")

This Is Us (NBC): "A Hell Of A Week Part 3!" Kate finds inner strength in unexpected places.  (That's the sole description of the episode tonight?!?!?!?) (They should tie in her showing up unexpectedly at the Oscars to sing---"Kate gets a gig singing at the Oscars, but her gig is almost derailed when no one introduces her on stage and she must perform without people knowing who she is!")

Gordon Ramsey's 24 Hours To Hell and Back (FOX):  Revamping a traditional Southern fried restaurant in Richmond Virginia. (Oh Southern Fried Food Restaurant--what i put would make it seem like the restaurant itself was Southern Fried...which i bet would probably make a pretty popular tourist destination honestly)

Mixed-ish (ABC): Rainbow is excited to go on her first real date with Bryce, however Alicia is wary to let Rainbow start dating so she invites Bryce's parents over to dinner instead; Paul gets into a fight with Bryce's dad over politics (So i'm guessing the dinner doesn't go well then??? Also does Mike Bloomberg show up--"As Former Mayor of NYC..." "Uhh Mr. Bloomberg--this show takes place in 1985" "As Future Mayor of NYC...." "Goddamnit!!!!")

Legends of Tomorrow (The CW): Sara, Rory, and Ava crash a high school reunion to stop a serial killer from finishing unfinished business; Constantine is annoyed when Former Mayor of NYC Michael Bloomberg won't stop interrupting his favorite tv shows...I mean Constantine is annoyed that Charlie has been squatting in his old home. (The episode is titled "Slay Anything" HA!)

American Experience (PBS): In this rerun from October 2004 (Vintage!) The 1938 World Heavyweight Championship between Joe Louis and Max Schmeling is profiled. (Can something be Double Vintage???)

Schitt's Creek (POP): Alexis and Moira deal with the aftermath of a viral video; while Johnny helps Bob get back out into the dating world. (nods) (SCHITT'S CREEK!!!!)

Ali and Cavett The Tale of the Tapes (HBO): This premiere documentary is comprised of unseen footage of Muhammad Ali appearing on various episodes of The Dick Cavett Show over the years that that show was on the air. (It runs until 10:40 so if you're watching--set your DVR accordingly)

Curse of Oak Island (History): Excitement abounds when Gary uncovers Former NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg (NOOOOOO!!!!)---no i'm kidding--Gary uncovers an ancient tunneling pool in the swamp; the team obtains hard scientific evidence suggesting that they may have finally located the original 35 mm print of The Money Pit. (Nice!)

Chopped (Food): $50,000 Cooking Challenge Part 4!

Life Below Zero (Nat Geo):

Moonshiners (Discovery): 250 gallons of moonshine is on the verge of expiring and only one man can do something about this. (Please don't be...Please don't be...Please don't be...) Former NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg guest stars. (hangs head) (I'm kidding he's not gonna show up here--Or Is He?!?!?!?)

Gomer Pyle (MeTV): Gomer wins a boat in a jingle contest, but has no idea what to do with it so Sgt. Carter offers to pay for the upkeep in exchange for part ownership. (Shazam????)


9:30

Black-ish (ABC): Dre tries to get Bow a meaningful gift for Valentine's Day (but former NYC mayor Michael Bloomberg keeps blocking him at every turn); ("You know Dre, I've found that the best Valentine's Day gift to a significant other can be a better America for you to raise your kids") ("Where in the HELL did you even come from dude??? This Is My House!!!"); Ruby teaches Jack how to get a girl after hearing about his love troubles, but her ways prove too old fashioned to help Jack out all that much. ("Come here Michael Bloomberg...I wanna have a talk with you")

10:00

FBI Most Wanted (CBS):  When a military veteran snaps after the death of his brother in arms, the decorated sniper's expert abilities push the team to its limit; Crosby's personal struggles bubble to the surface when the case begins to hit too close to home. (Crosby was Dax Shepard's character on Parenthood--I know he's not on this show because he's on Bless This Mess, but i like to imagine him as Crosby here just cause I don't know who Crosby is on this show...yet!)

New Amsterdam (NBC): The doctors stop at nothing to help their patients after a shocking realization that prompts a change in the hospital (That's not vague or anything); Reynolds must make an important decision in his career. (That's...Also not vague or anything!) (New Amsterdam--Its Become Much Too Much...Do I Have The Possession Of Everything That She Touches...Do I Step Out The Way Or Fall Into Her Clutches...)

For Life (ABC): After roughly 30 thousand ads for it for the Oscars, here is the premiere of what has to be a sure fire favorite of Cancellation League Ballots everywhere! "Aaron Wallace seeks to overturn his own wrongful conviction by becoming a lawyer and ends up fighting on behalf of his fellow inmates from behind bars" (Yes, I know the premise, I've only seen the ads for it almost as much as I've seen Bloomberg's ads--and you can see what kind of effect those have had on me--- "You know that For Life should totally be the Democratic nominee for 2020" "Uhh I think you have your constant ads switched around there" "No, I know what i'm talking about!"

Frontline (PBS): "Battle for Hong Kong"--A look inside the frontline (I see what you did there!) of the battle for human rights and freedoms that exist but are under threat in Hong Kong.  (nods) Sure they may have a terrible crackdown on human rights happening there, but on the other hand, they also aren't being bombarded with Mike Bloomberg for President ads every five minutes sooo i mean...take the good, take the bad.  (No Matthew, people are being killed over there! You can't possibly equate the two!) (Ohh i didn't realize people were getting murdered over there, yeah that's no good)

Project Blue Book (History): When alleged alien beings invade a home in rural Kentucky; Hyrenk and Quinn are brought in on the CIA's top secret program MK Ultra; which believes that the attack maybe the start of a much larger invasion. (Is It??? Only Time Will Tell) The episode is titled "Hopkinsville!"

Guardians of the Glade (Discovery): The team targets giant snakes off the islands of Snake Bright Bay. (Finally something I can relate to tonight!)

10:30

Miracle Workers-Dark Ages (TBS): And lastly tonight Prince Chauncley and Lord Vexler go out on a diplomatic mission; a new invention shakes up Eddie's business.  (God i hope said new invention isn't the idea of buying commercial time for a futile political campaign!)

THAT'S IT FOR ME HERE---AS YOU CAN TELL I THINK MY BRAIN MAY HAVE BEEN HIJACKED BY THE BLOOMBERG CAMPAIGN PEOPLE---THAT"S THE ONLY EXPLANATION I CAN FIND HONESTLY. WE ALL BETTER HOPE THAT THAT TECHNOLOGY THAT ALLOWS ADVERTISERS TO INSERT ADS DIRECTLY INTO PEOPLES' DREAMS THAT THEY HAD THAT ONE TIME ON FUTURAMA NEVER ACTUALLY BECOMES A REAL THING CAUSE THEN WE'RE REALLY DONE FOR AS A SOCIETY!



 


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