What's On Tonight (Saturday): Move over Sheldon, Young Dylan has arrived... sans bazingas

Young Dylan (via Giphy)

Good day everyone and welcome to the third ever February 29 edition of WOT! Tonight, like every Saturday, the pickings are slim, but a series premiere proves worth highlighting... to me. With the premiere of Young Dylan, Tyler Perry expands his crummy television empire to Nickelodeon. The show, starring YouTube rapper Dylan Gilmer, sounds similar to Fresh Prince. I know, I know... none of you even care because you won't watch it. Elsewhere, the stars come together for a benefit concert for Australia, William Shatner is back to talk about Earth's mysteries, Sasha Luss is an assassin, Seven Worlds, One Planet and Heartland Docs conclude, and Pierce Brosnan assumes the role of Remington Steele. My micromechanism thanks you, my computer tapes thank you, and I thank you, here's what's on television for tonight, Saturday, February 29!

STREAMING / EARLY PRIMETIME

ARASHI's Diary -Voyage- (Netflix, 3 a.m.): Episodes three and four drop for this monthly series that follows Japan's top boy band of the 21st century, who will go on a hiatus at the end of the year.✔️

Doctor Who 📺 (Retro TV, 6 p.m.): In "The Deadly Assassin," the Master seeks to restore his life force by disrupting a power source that would destroy Gallifrey along with the Doctor, who is companion-less. IIRC, this also established the 12-regeneration limit.

Murdoch Mysteries (Ovation, 7 p.m.): After a young woman is critically injured from a fall, Murdoch and Ogden suspect her family is complicit. Later, when a whiskey baron and his family are murdered, Murdoch puts Parker in the cells with a hit man to see who hired him.

Tour of Duty 📺 (Heroes & Icons, 7 p.m.): Anderson, Goldman, Percell, and Horn go on a special mission with combat veteran and "war lover"" Earl Ray Michaels.

FOR THE RECORD: Criminal Confessions (Oxygen, 6 p.m.); Hi Bye, Mama! (Netflix, 3 a.m.); Hyena (Netflix, 3 a.m.); Itaewon Class (Netflix, 3 a.m.); Up and Vanished (Oxygen, 7 p.m.)

ARASHI (via Giphy)

🕗 EASTERN / 🕖 CENTRAL

Anna 🎥 (HBO, 8 p.m.): Beneath Sasha Luss' striking beauty lies a secret that will unleash her indelible strength and skill to become one of the world's most feared government assassins. The cast includes Helen Mirren, Luke Evans, and Cillian Murphy.✔️

Dying to Be You 🎥 (Lifetime, 8 p.m.): Terror strikes when a young woman learns that her pen pal since childhood plans to take over her life.

Henry Danger (Nickelodeon, 8 p.m.): Kid Danger reveals to Captain Man that he doesn't want to be stuck in Swellview and be his sidekick forever, which is definitely setting up for the series finale in a few weeks. To make matters worse, Kid Danger is recruited by another town to be their hero.

The Magical Cracker 🎥 (Showtime, 9 p.m.): I can never resist including this title.

⭐ Young Dylan (Nickelodeon, 8:30 p.m.): SERIES PREMIERE. Young Dylan's grandmother decides to send him to live indefinitely with her affluent son's family. The Wilson family household is soon turned upside down as lifestyles clash between aspiring hip-hop star and his straight-laced cousins. The show also stars Carl Anthony Payne II. Cockroach!

FOR THE RECORD: Say Yes to the Dress America (TLC)

Anna (via Giphy)

🕘 EASTERN / 🕗 CENTRAL

All That (Nickelodeon, 9 p.m.): Alex teaches a new Spanish lesson... Lucy tries to control her emotions in a yoga class... Reece calls in a favor from a professional baseball player... a manager at a pizza place teaches his employees about birthdays. Some days ago, Nick ordered more episodes.

Seven Worlds, One Planet (BBC America, 9 p.m.): FINALE. More from the mother of mankind. Africa is home to the greatest wildlife show on Earth... chimps make tools, cheetah hunt prey twice their size and devious imposters trick fish mothers.

FOR THE RECORD: Ancient Aliens (History); Cake Boss (Discovery Family); Dateline NBC (NBC); Family or Fiancé (OWN, finale); The Incredible Dr. Pol (Nat Geo Wild)✔️; Live PD (A&E); Pit Bulls & Parolees (Animal Planet); These Woods Are Haunted (Travel Channel)

The Incredible Dr. Pol (via Giphy)

🕙 EASTERN / 🕘 CENTRAL

Remington Steele 📺 (Decades, 10 p.m.): Spend the weekend with a young Pierce Brosnan in this quality pre-Moonlighting will-they/won't-they detective dramedy. In this season three episode, Steele's pockets are picked by a lad who unknowingly grabs evidence in a loan-sharking case, putting his life in danger.✔️

The Sonny and Cher Show 📺 (getTV, 10 p.m.): The Smothers Brothers! Barbara Eden!

FOR THE RECORD: 48 Hours (CBS); Fire Masters (Cooking Channel, finale); Haunted Hospitals (Travel Channel); Heartland Docs, DVM (Nat Geo Wild, finale); The Unxplained (History, premiere); The Vet Life (Animal Planet)

🕚 EASTERN / 🕙 CENTRAL

Fire Fight Australia (Fox, 11 p.m.): Star-studded benefit concert raising money for key organizations providing vital short, medium and long-term rescue, recover and rehabilitation assistance in Australia's fire-affected areas.✔️

Flip Wilson ...Of Course 📺 (getTV, 11 p.m.): In this 1974 special, Flip welcomes Richard Pryor, Peter Sellers, and Lily Tomlin.

Hill Street Blues 📺 (Heroes & Icons, 11 p.m.): A department regulation requiring urine samples for drug-testing makes Coffey, Washington and Garibaldi nervous. Sketchy things will happen. Later, Hill and Renko are assigned to the department's goodwill ambassador, a senile bear with a fondness for hand-to-paw combat.

My Hero Academia (Adult Swim, 11:30 p.m.): The heroes recover from the fight against Shie Hassaikai. The League of Villains attacks Chisaki's transport.

💤💤😴💤💤

Black Clover (Adult Swim, 1:30 a.m.): Finral and Yami confront possessed members of the Golden Dawn; when the Silva family home comes under siege, Nozel and Noelle defend their siblings.

Demon Slayer (Adult Swim, 12:30 a.m.): Tanjiro is violently ejected from his clash with the father spider demon and comes face to face with another demon who tortures her own kind.

Food Wars! (Adult Swim, 1 a.m.): Akira and Ryo whip up an intense semifinal match.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Golden Wind (Adult Swim, 2 a.m.): Despite getting knocked out, Prosciutto's Stand continues aging everyone on the train as the fight between Bucciarati and Pesci comes to a head.

Lost in Space 📺 (MeTV, 1 a.m.): After their food supply is wiped out in a freak storm, a trader arrives willing to trade food the Robinsons for equipment. Dr. Smith trades the robot for food and hoards the supplies for himself.

Naruto: Shippuden (Adult Swim, 2:30 a.m.): Naruto, an adolescent ninja, dreams of becoming the Hokage in his village.✔️

Sword Art Online: Alicization – War of Underworld (Adult Swim, midnight): An Integrity Knight abandons his post, leaving Kirito open to a goblin attack.

Naruto: Shippuden (via Giphy)

LATE-NIGHT TV

The Greg Gutfeld Show (Fox News, 10 p.m.): Ed Henry, Kristen Soltis Anderson, Kat Timpf, and Tyrus
Saturday Night Live (NBC, 11:29 p.m.): John Mulaney and David Byrne (live thread)
SNL Vintage 📺 (NBC, 10 p.m.): Alec Baldwin and Ed Sheeran (11 Feb 2017)

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Note: All times are Eastern.

Key Sources: The Futon Critic (outline); Zap2it (descriptions); TV Passport (throwbacks)
⭐: Top pick(s)
📺: Throwback
🎥: Movie
✔️: Midlevel video/gif

Happy watching, everyone!